(!) What do you look for in a woman? (!)

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:17 pm

Must have a little curve to the hips.
Sense of humour is optional...but must laugh politely at my jokes in social settings.
NO cankles.
She can be a "whore in the bedroom", but don't think for a second that I'm going to let "angel in the kitchen" slide.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:19 pm

Small titties is okay, but "flapjacks" are OUT.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:22 pm

A little doughy is passable...but you know how chicks will drop a shit tonne of weight in the first months of a relationship before getting

comfortable

...

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:23 pm

Balls

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:25 pm

Screw_Michigan wrote:Balls

I think Goobs just had an aneurism... :|

mvscal · Post by **mvscal** » Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:36 pm

5 year old children.

--Pedo in Seattle

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:48 pm

The inflation valve stem.

-SBY

A dungeon in her basement.

-mvsidiot

Screw_Michigan · Post by **Screw_Michigan** » Fri Sep 11, 2015 6:53 pm

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote: I think Goobs just had an aneurism... :|

That was the point.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Fri Sep 11, 2015 7:04 pm

My large American penis.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Fri Sep 11, 2015 10:50 pm

KC Scott wrote:
Diego in Seattle wrote: A dungeon in her basement.

-mvsidiot

Oh I'm sorry, the correct response was "who is Toddowen?"

Nah...for toddowen the requirement would be "must be able to put the lotion on it's skin"...

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Fri Sep 11, 2015 11:54 pm

KC Scott wrote:
Diego in Seattle wrote: A dungeon in her basement.

-mvsidiot

Oh I'm sorry, the correct response was "who is Toddowen?"

Would you like to try Jared Fogel's favorite movies for $500?

Then what do you call that place below ground level in his house with the rack & chains where his wife beats him?

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Sat Sep 12, 2015 1:59 am

Must be a big Tom Hanks fan

- You know who

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Sat Sep 12, 2015 3:01 pm

.net was right about this place...

trev · Post by **trev** » Sun Sep 13, 2015 7:19 pm

Marty, you sound lonely. Everything Ok?

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Sun Sep 13, 2015 8:52 pm

I...uhhh...I...you....uhhhhhh....you....

pron · Post by **pron** » Sun Sep 13, 2015 9:09 pm

This is what I look for in a woman.

atmdad · Post by **atmdad** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 8:01 pm

A pulse.

~sin~
Dins

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 8:09 pm

atmdad wrote:A pulse.

~sin~
Dins

Inaccurate.

I have 2 rules:

1) Here

2) Breathing

And there's some wiggle-room on #2.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 8:15 pm

Papa Willie wrote:A good-looking brother I can hook up with.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 9:00 pm

Interesting. My experiences were somewhat similar, with a couple of exceptions.

I never lowered my expectations, which were mostly physical in nature.

I didn't settle down and get married until my mid-30s, but from that point on I would echo your observations.

I managed to score a lot of high-quality tail during my scuffling days. If I had it to do over, I might lower my standards just a tad. Sacrifice a little bit of quality for a lot more quantity. And I would have invented Tinder 40 years ago.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 9:02 pm

Interesting take 88. My college experiences were horrible. The ratio of men to women at the U of Maine in the late 50's-early 60's was about 7:1. Not good for a poor out of state guy. I was seeing a girl from New Hampshire for over 3 years. It was going nowhere and we split up before I graduated. I was playing the field after that, eventually living in Ogdensburg NY where the local hospital was a teaching hospital. Just about bachelor heaven. Then I met Mrs.O and everything just clicked. Still enjoying each other's company after 52 years, although the physical intensity has given way to kinder gentler affection. Do I still look? Of course, even lust in my heart (you did mention Jimmy Carter). My testosterone levels aren't that low.
When I told my old college buddy that I was getting married, he said, "I bet she has big tits.". He remembered one of my standards. (-:

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Tue Sep 15, 2015 9:06 pm

Wolfman wrote:It was going nowhere and we split up before I graduated.

But you got a little "tuna finger" before you dumped her, right?

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 10:38 pm

A few rolls in the hay as we used to say. Guess that calls for a Young Frankenstein reset.

R-Jack · Post by **R-Jack** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 10:42 pm

Young Teri Garr.....I'd have tuna elbow.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Wed Sep 16, 2015 12:01 am

Is there a man alive that does not remember the lines in this scene?

Moving Sale · Post by **Moving Sale** » Wed Sep 16, 2015 12:31 am

88 is done looking for anything in a women.

Sin,
Cliff notes

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Wed Sep 16, 2015 1:14 pm

Papa Willie wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:Interesting. My experiences were somewhat similar, with a couple of exceptions.

I never lowered my expectations, which were mostly physical in nature.

I didn't settle down and get married until my mid-30s, but from that point on I would echo your observations.

I managed to score a lot of high-quality tail during my scuffling days. If I had it to do over, I might lower my standards just a tad. Sacrifice a little bit of quality for a lot more quantity. And I would have invented Tinder 40 years ago.
So y'all are coming up on what - your 60-70th anniversary?

That's right, fatso. I'm 105. And people think I'm half that old.

T1B

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