Not bad. Check this one out:
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE),
he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Joke
Moderator: Jesus H Christ
-
Smackie Chan
- Eternal Scobode
- Posts: 7128
- Joined: Fri May 20, 2005 1:56 pm
- Location: Inside Your Speakers
A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He
breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her,
kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife, "Listen, this
guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of
time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain ... do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!"
His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any
Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you, too.
breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her,
kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife, "Listen, this
guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of
time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain ... do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us both. Be strong, honey. I love you!"
His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any
Vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you, too.
"I see everything twice!"
88
sorry to say that someone sent me that one
like last year ??
it's OK--maybe my goofy e-mailers are more
up to date than yours ??
is it spring yet back in OH ??
sorry to say that someone sent me that one
like last year ??
it's OK--maybe my goofy e-mailers are more
up to date than yours ??
is it spring yet back in OH ??
"It''s not dark yet--but it's getting there". -- Bob Dylan
Carbon Dating, the number one dating app for senior citizens.
"Blessed be the Lord my strength, which teaches my hands to the war, and my fingers to fight."
Carbon Dating, the number one dating app for senior citizens.
"Blessed be the Lord my strength, which teaches my hands to the war, and my fingers to fight."