5/21 is coming, fukkos

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

US preacher warns end of the world is nigh: 21 May, around 6pm, to be precise


Sunday, 27 March 2011


The end of the world is nigh; 21 May, to be precise. That's the date when Harold Camping, a preacher from Oakland, California, is confidently predicting the Second Coming of the Lord. At about 6pm, he reckons 2 per cent of the world's population will be immediately "raptured" to Heaven; the rest of us will get sent straight to the Other Place.

If Mr Camping were speaking from any normal pulpit, it would be easy to dismiss him as just another religious eccentric wrongly calling the apocalypse. But thanks to this elderly man's ubiquity, on America's airwaves and billboards, his unlikely Doomsday message is almost impossible to ignore.

Every day Mr Camping, an 89-year-old former civil engineer, speaks to his followers via the Family Radio Network, a religious broadcasting organisation funded entirely by donations from listeners. Such is their generosity (assets total $120m) that his network now owns 66 stations in the US alone.


Those deep pockets were raided to allow Family Radio to launch a high-profile advertising campaign, proclaiming the approaching Day of Judgement. More than 2,000 billboards across the US are adorned with its slogans, which include "Blow the trumpet, warn the people!". A fleet of logoed camper vans is touring every state in the nation. "It's getting real close. It's really getting pretty awesome, when you think about it," Mr Camping told The Independent on Sunday. "We're not talking about a ball game, or a marriage, or graduating from college. We're talking about the end of the world, a matter of being eternally dead, or being eternally alive, and it's all coming to a head right now."

Mr Camping, who makes programmes in 48 languages, boasts tens of thousands of followers across the globe, with radio stations in South Africa, Russia and Turkey. After 70 years of studying the Bible, he claims to have developed a system that uses mathematics to interpret prophesies hidden in it. He says the world will end on 21 May, because that will be 722,500 days from 1 April AD33, which he believes was the day of the Crucifixion. The figure of 722,500 is important because you get it by multiplying three holy numbers (five, 10 and 17) together twice. "When I found this out, I tell you, it blew my mind," he said.

Recent events, such as earthquakes in Japan, New Zealand and Haiti, are harbingers of impending doom, he says, as are changing social values. "All the stealing, and the lying, and the wickedness and the sexual perversion that is going on in society is telling us something," he says. "So too is the gay pride movement. It was sent by God as a sign of the end."

Mr Camping, who founded Family Radio in the 1950s, grew up a Baptist. Many of his strongly held views – he does not believe in evolution and thinks all abortion should be banned – are relatively commonplace among America's religious right.

Critics point out that this isn't the first time Mr Camping has predicted the second coming. On 6 September 1994, hundreds of his listeners gathered at an auditorium in Alameda looking forward to Christ's return.

"At that time there was a lot of the Bible I had not really researched very carefully," he said last week. "But now, we've had the chance to do just an enormous amount of additional study and God has given us outstanding proofs that it really is going to happen."

Mr Camping's argument has convinced Adam Larsen, 32, from Kansas. He is among scores of "ambassadors" who have quit their jobs to drive around America in Family Radio vehicles warning of the impending apocalypse. "My favourite pastime is raccoon hunting," Mr Larsen told CNN. "I've had to give that up. But this task is far more important."

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world ... 54139.html

RACK God and G0D for issuing the Rapture after the college basketball season has concluded. Oh, and VCU in the Final 4? Clearly another sign...

[trev]

Do we laugh or take pity on these people that follow him?

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

we've had the chance to do just an enormous amount of additional study and God has given us outstanding proofs that it really is going to happen.

Oh. OK.

See you on the 22nd, asshat.

[Mace]

I guess there's no need to file my income taxes this year, and I'll stock up on ice, coolers, and beer in preparation for going to "the other place."

[War Wagon]

Does this mean I can quit paying my mortgage and spend it all on booze and gambling instead?

Cool.

[trev]

This is happening 2 days after my birthday.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Is that guy takin a dump?

[Tom In VA]

Is that guy takin a dump?

There'll be much wailing, gnashing of teeth, and soilage of pants.

[trev]

He's taking a much needed dump on Planned Parenthood.

[The Seer]

This is happening 2 days after my birthday.

This is happening ON my birthday....

Maybe by design...Wonder if I have a role in it.

[Mace]

Does this mean I can quit paying my mortgage and spend it all on booze and gambling instead?

Cool.

Why not? Party hearty, Wags. Who knows, maybe there'll be a blackjack table in hell.....and I'll have the beer on ice for you.

And just my luck that this is going to happen before the Cubs can win a World Series and hell would be frozen over. No need to pack the ice skates, as there'll be no hockey in hell.

[smackaholic]

as soon as i get home, i'm second mortgaging the fukk outta my house and playing charlie sheen for the last few weeks.

[Mace]

as soon as i get home, i'm second mortgaging the fukk outta my house and playing charlie sheen for the last few weeks.

Do you think the banks and the IRS will take this into consideration if this guy is WRONG?

[titlover]

this is going to ruin my memorial day weekend plans.

[LTS TRN 2]

You know why an old prunefuck like Camping would go all in on a flameout all-or-nothing swan dive into an empty pool? Because like lots of weak men he's scared to die. I don't mean just an avoidance at all costs attitude towards dying, but rather a cowardly cringing fear of not being noticed--oh yeah, that dullest of geezers is a total diva--passively/aggressive perhaps, but still horrified at the prospect of exiting the stage. And of course he's a total nutjob. But his having 66 radio stations is surely a dire sign for America.

Here's some of the actual figgerin' he's been doin' lots of....

TIMING OF IMPORTANT EVENTS IN HISTORY
11,013 BC—Creation. God created the world and man (Adam and Eve).

4990 BC—The flood of Noah’s day. All perished in a worldwide flood. Only Noah, his wife, and his 3 sons and their wives survived in the ark (6023 years from creation).

7 BC—The year Jesus Christ was born (11,006 years from creation).

33 AD—The year Jesus Christ was crucified and the church age began (11,045 years from creation; 5023 calendar years from the flood).

1988 AD—This year ended the church age and began the great tribulation period of 23 years (13,000 years from creation).

1994 AD—On September 7th, the first 2300-day period of the great tribulation came to an end and the latter rain began, commencing God’s plan to save a great multitude of people outside of the churches (13,006 years from creation).

2011 AD—On May 21st, Judgment Day will begin and the rapture (the taking up into heaven of God’s elect people) will occur at the end of the 23-year great tribulation. On October 21st, the world will be destroyed by fire (7000 years from the flood; 13,023 years from creation).

[Cueball]

Why is he advertising a radio show from 5:30 - 7:00 if we're all buying the farm precisely around 6:00. I just know I would have hit Powerball that night playing 11,13,49,7,33 21

[Trampis]

Never forget the time my buddy and i went to Seattle to go to the supercross in 88. We're both 17 y.o seniors in h.s. and went and stayed the night with his mom and step-dad who was an ardent born again babtits, christian fundy...whatever.

At 17, I was a straight laced kid, and "dad" wanted to convert me to go the whole nine yards to the Sunday side. Fukin, world is ending stuff, go with the god side or the darkside stuff. I came out alright, he gave me a free cap and seemed to like me despite me not jumping for joy about God killing me for being a bad Christian in the near future because, damn it, the end is near!

Hes divorced now from my buddies mom, and filed for bankruptcy. Decent dude besides. Oh well.

Ive got some work to do in May, maybe we can push this endtimes back to June so I can have some money saved for the trip.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

You guys gettin' nervous yet?

[Screw_Michigan]

Nobody cares.

[Mikey]

I guess I can ignore my jury duty on 5/23.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Nobody cares.

Why don't you go scour some backwoods fishwraps for more irrelevant poli stories. Oh, and eat a dick.

[Felix]

US preacher warns end of the world is nigh: 21 May, around 6pm, to be precise

is that east East Coast or West Coast time?

[indyfrisco]

US preacher warns end of the world is nigh: 21 May, around 6pm, to be precise

is that east East Coast or West Coast time?

And is the around 6:00 PM or precisely 6:00 PM.

[L45B]

Judgment Day will begin and the rapture (the taking up into heaven of God’s elect people) will occur at the end of the 23-year great tribulation. On October 21st, the world will be destroyed by fire (7000 years from the flood; 13,023 years from creation).

Dogs and cats living together... Mass Hysteria!!

[poptart]

The end of the world is nigh; 21 May, to be precise. That's the
date when Harold Camping, a preacher from Oakland, California,
is confidently predicting the Second Coming of the Lord. At about 6pm



You sure it's not gonna be 6:07 pm, Harold?






Matthew 24:35-36 (Jesus Christ speaking)
Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my words shall not pass away.
But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.




No man knows the day or hour.

Harold included. :)

[Goober McTuber]

poptart? We thought you offed yourself?

[poptart]

poptart? We thought you offed yourself?

Had a PM.

Saw this thread and wanted to comment.


I'll be IN on August 10th at 9:07 pm - and maybe before if world events are crying out for my commentary.


Much <3 to you, Gobbler.

[Goober McTuber]

<3

WTF? You kids and your text messages!