? for functional alcoholics

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Bizzarofelice
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? for functional alcoholics

Post by Bizzarofelice »

You ever order the premium liquor in your drink, taste it and know for a fact its Congress or Old Crow?

If yes, how do you approach that? This bitch is expecting you to pay premium prices for the shit liquor. You go after the manager or the bartender or the server? I just went home and yelled at my wife.
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Post by BSmack »

Go to another bar.
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Post by PrimeX »

This is a great question Bacefelice. I sincerely hope that somene on this forum will be able to give you some great feeback in a timely manner.

Have a great day.
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Post by patsy stone »

Customer is always right, Bace. I woulda argued it.

And who is using PrimeX's nic?
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Tom In VA
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Post by Tom In VA »

It all tastes the same after awhile. At that point your feeding your ego and not your addiction.

After the first one or two "high dollar" drinks, go cheap and fire for effect. You might need the money for bail/fine later.


But then again, I wasn't a functional alkie. :lol:
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

PrimeX wrote:feeback
That's what I would've asked for.
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Post by PrimeX »

patsy stone wrote:Customer is always right, Bace. I woulda argued it.

And who is using PrimeX's nic?
May the PrimeX share with the members here the most wonderful pictures you sent to my phone last weekend?

It would be most appreciated by many, I'm sure.
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Post by Bizzarofelice »

Tom In VA wrote:It all tastes the same after awhile.
But I'm drinking the Congress and Tonic right now and not enjoying it.
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Post by Tom In VA »

Bizzarofelice wrote:
Tom In VA wrote:It all tastes the same after awhile.
But I'm drinking the Congress and Tonic right now and not enjoying it.
That's all in your head. Change your attitude and you'll enjoy it more.

"It's good enough, it's smooth enough, and gosh darnit, I'm getting a buzz going".
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Post by YD »

Unless I'm totally sure the place is boss, I just order beers.

I hate rollin the dice on a measured or bootleg drink(s)
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Post by dotdotdot »

I usually just bring my own flask in.
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Post by The Whistle Is Screaming »

Top shelf stuff shouldn't be "mixed" with anything other than other top shelf stuff. Why people order a screwdriver with Grey Goose or Crown & coke is beyond me. If you're mixing with juice or soda, then no sense wasting the good stuff. If you are drinking on the rocks, straight up or a Martini/Manhatten then go with the good stuff. It isn't rocket surgery people, use a little common sense.
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Post by Mr T »

First: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be able to afford the premium liquor.
Second: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be drinking mix drinks.

I hope that helps.
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Post by Tom In VA »

Mr T wrote:First: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be able to afford the premium liquor.
Second: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be drinking mix drinks.

I hope that helps.
Aside from it's complete inaccuracy, it's very informative.
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Post by pron »

PrimeX wrote:
patsy stone wrote:Customer is always right, Bace. I woulda argued it.

And who is using PrimeX's nic?
May the PrimeX share with the members here the most wonderful pictures you sent to my phone last weekend?

It would be most appreciated by many, I'm sure.
Sure, post those pics. ;)
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Post by Mr T »

Tom In VA wrote:
Mr T wrote:First: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be able to afford the premium liquor.
Second: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be drinking mix drinks.

I hope that helps.
Aside from it's complete inaccuracy, it's very informative.
How so?

Look up the definition of alcoholism and tell me how i am wrong.
TheJON wrote:What does the winner get? Because if it's a handjob from Frisco, I'd like to campaign for my victory.
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Post by Tom In VA »

Mr T wrote:
Tom In VA wrote:
Mr T wrote:First: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be able to afford the premium liquor.
Second: If you were a true alcoholic, you wouldnt be drinking mix drinks.

I hope that helps.
Aside from it's complete inaccuracy, it's very informative.
How so?

Look up the definition of alcoholism and tell me how i am wrong.
:lol: Neither the time nor place. For sake of not giving a shit. ... Dude you were totally right on, RACK you.
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Post by Bizzarofelice »

GODDAMN! Stop splitting hairs and answer the fucking question. If you don't, I will proceed to beat the living shit out of my wife every time I come home from a shitty bar experience.

Its a motherfucking fact that you don't drink gin solo. Its a warm weather drink to go Gin and tonic, and I can't fucking stand cheap gin. I loves nicer gin because its super-duper yummy.

DEAL WITH IT, FUCKOS!
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Post by Mr T »

Run rabbit run.

I'll help you out....
Alcoholism is the consumption of or preoccupation with alcoholic beverages to the extent that this behavior interferes with the alcoholic's normal personal, family, social, or work life.
Its not "ooo....i drink on the weekends. I am a alcoholic"

No its "Shut up bitch where the fuck is my Heaven Hill"
TheJON wrote:What does the winner get? Because if it's a handjob from Frisco, I'd like to campaign for my victory.
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Post by Tom In VA »

Suggest that if he doesn't start giving you what you'll pay for, you will burn his car and his bar down.
With all the horseshit around here, you'd think there'd be a pony somewhere.
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Post by Tom In VA »

Mr T wrote:Run rabbit run.

I'll help you out....
Alcoholism is the consumption of or preoccupation with alcoholic beverages to the extent that this behavior interferes with the alcoholic's normal personal, family, social, or work life.
Its not "ooo....i drink on the weekends. I am a alcoholic"

No its "Shut up bitch where the fuck is my Heaven Hill"
Okay. Whatever floats your boat. We're here for Bizzarofelice. A brother in need. Can't you break free of the self centered need to be RIGHT and focus on the needs of Bizzarofelice ?
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Post by Mr T »

He is complaining about a drink he got at t.g.i.o'malleys or whatever the fuck.

What the fuck is he expecting from it?
TheJON wrote:What does the winner get? Because if it's a handjob from Frisco, I'd like to campaign for my victory.
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Post by Tom In VA »

He paid for a high dollar drink and got swill that's what's wrong.


He and his wife need our help. Got any ideas ?
With all the horseshit around here, you'd think there'd be a pony somewhere.
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Post by indyfrisco »

Whoever said go to a different bar is right. If you complain, expect smaller and smaller pours each time.
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Post by Tom In VA »

Oh sure, easy for you to say Indy.

A real functional alcoholic would whip out his dick and piss on the bar screaming ... "Motherfuckers, my piss is better than the swill you serve here".

And then when the cops come to arrest him say all the things police officers like to hear ...

"Do you know who the fuck I am"

"What's your badge number, I hope you like being a crossing guard cause when I get through with you they MIGHT let you do that ..."

Etc.. etc...

Real, functional alcoholics rarely do a sober thing like ..... switch bars ... unless of course they don't want people at the bar to see how alcoholic they are ... then they switch bars.
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Post by Bizzarofelice »

Mr T wrote:Run rabbit run.
What the fuck is this? I am going to go home and punch that FUCKING BITCH IN HER GODDAMNED THROAT!! I am NOT fucking around here. Shitty gin is everyone's problem, and the only person taking this seriously is HBJ.

Thank you, Tom in VA, for giving this matter the serious attention it warrants.
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Post by Douchebag »

Bizzarofelice wrote:What the fuck is this? I am going to go home and punch that FUCKING BITCH IN HER GODDAMNED THROAT!! I am NOT fucking around here.
Fuck yeah!!!! show that bitch!

i like you
Get fucked, dick.
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Post by Bizzarofelice »

Douchebag wrote:
Bizzarofelice wrote:What the fuck is this? I am going to go home and punch that FUCKING BITCH IN HER GODDAMNED THROAT!! I am NOT fucking around here.
Fuck yeah!!!! show that bitch!

i like you
^^^^^
FINALLY!
One of you STUPID, CHRIS-HANSEN MEETING, PANTS-AROUND-THE-ANKLES BOY-FUCKERS understands! I work all goddamned day, and I want to fucking drink. When I think of that delicious tanqueray it helps me get through my dull motherfucking day. WHEN MY FUCKING DREAM IS ABOUT TO BE REALIZED I PUT THE DRINK TO MY LIPS ONLY TO TASTE SOME JUNIPER BERRY/BUTTSWEAT CHEAP ASS GIN!!!! My dream is deferred because some bitch LIED TO ME about offering legit liquor.

SOMEONE WILL PAY!

Me and douchebag should go out drinking and putting losers in their place.
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Post by KC Scott »

Tom In VA wrote:It all tastes the same after awhile.
You obviously don't drink Scotch

I can be passed out cold and still tell if somone is trying to sneak J&B or Dewars on me
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Post by Tom In VA »

KC Scott wrote:
Tom In VA wrote:It all tastes the same after awhile.
You obviously don't drink Scotch

I can be passed out cold and still tell if somone is trying to sneak J&B or Dewars on me
Well I guess you're just money like that. :lol:


I misrepresented my thought. "It all tastes the same" is obviously false. What I meant to say is the drunker I get the less I give a shit what it tastes like as long as it's booze.

Plus I ain't rich, so I would indulge in the high quality stuff .... for me it was Guiness ..... for a few and then switch to whatever in order to get my drunk on and kick the shit out of people like Douchebag :shock:
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Post by ElvisMonster »

Gotta keep your head on a swivel at a lot of chain places. Bonuses get kicked around for keeping liquor costs low. One way to do that is to pour rail instead of top shelf if the customer isn't sitting right there at the bar.

More than one bartender has told me that if you're not a regular that tips well, your drink is going to be teh sukk.

I'm sure that not every place does it, but I've heard the stories often enough from enough bartenders that I stick to beer unless I'm at a place I know.
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Post by KC Scott »

ElvisMonster wrote: More than one bartender has told me that if you're not a regular that tips well, your drink is going to be teh sukk.
Yet another reason to avoid St. Loser at all costs :drd:

Or make sure to sit at the bar and keep one eye open
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Post by Mister Bushice »

sip the drink, then spew the booze back into the bar well, yelling "what is this shit, old crow"? then demand to use the phone so you can give your Uncle, the Alcoholic Beverage Commission a call so they'll be fined.

No need to tell them you just meant your uncle the alcoholic. If you place your pauses correctly it will be effective as hell.
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Post by The Seer »

You need to direct your queries to a more narrow audience base....

1. If you don't think you got the premium you ordered, let the server know there's been a mistake and send it back.

2. While taste-wise it is true that ordering say Absolut in a screwdriver will basically taste the same as rotgut (Gordon's), if you plan on serious imbibing, the cleaner, top shelf liquor will allow for a milder hangover....That is fact.
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Post by James Dean Bradfield »

well if you want my .02 . Drink good beer

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Post by ElvisMonster »

KC Scott wrote:Yet another reason to avoid St. Loser at all costs :drd:
Sadly, I've heard this story every place from Jackson to the Meth-Plex. UnWAR denying a man his hard earned reward after a tough day.

If I see Applebee's, I will fight him.
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Post by Screw_Michigan »

Bizzarofelice wrote:I am going to go home and punch that FUCKING BITCH IN HER GODDAMNED THROAT!! I am NOT fucking around here.
i expect many more quality PHX ROB resets out of you in the future, bace. keep it up.
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Post by War Wagon »

Mr T wrote: Alcoholism is the consumption of or preoccupation with alcoholic beverages to the extent that this behavior interferes with the alcoholic's normal personal, family, social, or work life.
Where the fuck did you get this definition from, a Magoo authored wiki article, or did you just pull it right out of your own ass?
Mace wrote:Actually, you're dead wrong and, since Tom doesn't want to play, I'll try to educate you.
Actually Mace, Mr. Twat Lips isn't only dead wrong, he's dead ignorant. Tom may know a thing or two about alcoholism. But I'm not so sure about you.
There are a great many wealthy alcoholics who can afford the very best to stock their liquor cabinets and I've known a lot of alcoholics who drink mixed drinks and/or beer.
How do you know if they we're alcoholics, Mace? Alcoholism is a self-diagnosed condition, so unless they themselves told you they were alcoholic, then you're in no position to say that with any certainty.

Forget the definition of alcoholism for a minute, and focus instead on what it means to be an alcoholic, functional or not. For an alchoholic, it doesn't matter what you drink, how much, or how often. The only thing that matters is what happens when they drink as a consequence.
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Post by Dinsdale »

Toddowen wrote:So what this suggest is that a person need never have consumed a single alcoholic beverage to be considered an alcoholic?

Exactly.

Alcoholism is a physiological condition that a person is either born with, or they are not.

And frankly, alcohol consumption has no æffect on this whatsoever.

An alcoholic who never consumes a drop will never suffer from the ill-æffects of the disease, and will never know they are æffected.

An alcoholic who begins consuming alcohol will sooner or later find out what being an alcoholic means.


People seems to have some serious misconceptions about alcoholism, and rarely seem to be able to regognize the distinction between "alcoholism" and "habitual/problem drinking." It has everything to do with the way a person's body processes alcohol, and absolutely nothing to do with the quantity or frequency a person drinks.


Educate yourselves, people. Statements like "Dentists have an extremely high rate of alcoholism, as do police officers and other people in professions with high levels of stress" are fucking asinine. The only lines you can draw in regards to "these people have higher rates of alcoholism" are along ethnic lines, and have absofuckinglutely nothing to do with one's job or level of stress. Sure, an alcoholic that's under high stress is more likely to have an "episode" or let the alcoholism take over, but it has ZERO to do with alcoholism rates in any given group, which is strictly a function of genetics.


It's hard to believe the rampant ignorance on this subject in this day and age.


Then again, I took a whole fucking bunch of classes and read many a textbook on the subject...and not by choice.
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Post by bbqjones »

i am an alcoholic

and im watching jeepers creepers 2 on USA*

*im also a patriot
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