T1B

My advisors told me to start working the message board circuit, so here I am. First off, let me just say anybody who doesn't vote for me is a loser. The vast majority who plan to vote for me are also losers. Losers with sense.

I have to be honest with you people. If I had my way, I'd round up every last person in this country who isn't a white male with a net worth of less than $500 million, and send them all to extermination camps. Now I know what you're thinking. The population would die off if we eliminated all the women. Small price to pay for making America great again. Actually, I would make an exception for my daughter whom I would allow all of the rich men in our new society to impregnate, under the stipulation that I get to watch.

But I'm as realistic as I am honest and I know that platform won't fly with you peons. So I'm here today to dispel a few things about myself. Lyin' Ted and all the haters accuse me of being tight lipped about my policies. Well I am literally tight lipped. I'm trying to appeal to the young female vote by working on my duckface selfie game:



What do you guys think? Sexy, huh?

As for the specifics of my policies, what do you really need to know? Take healthcare for example. There are people out there who need healthcare. I plan on giving them access to healthcare. The rest is just a bunch of boring paperwork.

Homeland security? "Dark hair and olive skin -----> you ain't comin' in." That's our new motto. And you already know about my plan to build a wall around Mexico. It's going to be 50 feet high, capped with gold, and holograms of my face stretching the perimeter of it. If Mexico doesn't pay, then we'll force a few thousand illegals into slavery and have them build the wall, then kick them over the other side as soon as it's finished.

I'll take your questions.

Shit is getting real here at T1B.

Who will you nominate to be your running mate? Dan J? Sick Fuck?

Lets have some good Melania pics.

Screw_Michigan wrote:Shit is getting real here at T1B.

Who will you nominate to be your running mate? Dan J? Sick Fuck?

I'm not familiar with those people but they sound like huge losers.

I'm not sure there's a human being on the planet worthy of being my running mate. That's why I'm working with scientists to clone another version of myself.

Are you building a fence on the U.S.A./Canada border too?

Can you put Manitoba on your side?

How badly did getting less votes than a foam party gaylord in Wyoming sting?

I'm not familiar with those people but they sound like huge losers.

The kiss of death..
one of the unwritten rules of Messageboarding

Never call out The Alliance.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:Are you building a fence on the U.S.A./Canada border too?

Can you put Manitoba on your side?

They got oil, don't they?

Maybe we can work a trade, Manitoba for Michigan and a state to be named later. And yes, you have to take Detoilet.

smackaholic wrote:


They got oil, don't they?

They've got mosquito infested bogs...

...and retards.

Our prime minister is ready to sign a new trade agreement with Trump, as long as he promises to construct a "Cone Of Stupidity" around Mikey's house.

We may not have a cure for ignorance, but we sure can contain it.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:

smackaholic wrote:


They got oil, don't they?

They've got

...and retards.

Big deal. Every province is full of retards.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:

smackaholic wrote:


They got oil, don't they?

They've got mosquito infested bogs...

...and retards.

Sounds like Joisy.

smackaholic wrote:

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:

smackaholic wrote:


They got oil, don't they?

They've got mosquito infested bogs...

...and retards.

Sounds like Joisy.

Jersey has better pizza.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:

smackaholic wrote:

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:They've got mosquito infested bogs...

...and retards.

Sounds like Joisy.

Jersey has better pizza.

They do a better job of training their retards.

Their retards are just better organized. I'm sure you've heard of the United Brotherhood of Retards Local 10039, Paramus.

Horrible shit troll

I've used seen worse...

mvscal wrote:Horrible shit troll

Listen, as soon as you cast your vote for The Donald you're dead to me. I care about the dingleberries I wipe from my ass with $100 dollar bills more than I care about you middle class losers. Just do your part to get me in office then I'll forget about you faster than I forgot about all those illegals I hired to build Trump Tower.

Die, shit troll.

Goober McTuber wrote:Die, shit troll.

Ich wusste nicht , dass Sie Deutsch sprach.

:?

Goober McTuber wrote:Die, shit troll.

It's beneath me to disrespect senior citizens, so I'm going to bite my tongue. That said, fuck Bernie Sanders.

Donald, what is your opinion of the reindeer?

BSmack wrote:Donald, what is your opinion of the reindeer?

Yeah, and which one was he? Shit trolls of a feather, and whatsuch.

Goober McTuber wrote:

BSmack wrote:Donald, what is your opinion of the reindeer?

Yeah, and which one was he? Shit trolls of a feather, and whatsuch.

Still stinging, Methuselah?

Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:

Goober McTuber wrote:

BSmack wrote:Donald, what is your opinion of the reindeer?

Yeah, and which one was he? Shit trolls of a feather, and whatsuch.

Still stinging, Methuselah?

Yes, my boots took quite a beating from little reindeer butts.

Remind me again, which one were you?