NFL draft - and free agency period

Brock in Va Beach · Post by **Brock in Va Beach** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:18 pm

I think y'all have about 000.1% chance of Moss coming back to the Raiders. Don't get your hopes up.

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:20 pm

Jeff in SD wrote:So are the 49ers that stupid! They have the chance to get Lance Briggs yet they blow their wad on Justin Smith?

Well, our GM did warn Ninerfans not to expect us to have as many high-profile signings as last year.

At least he's living up to that promise.

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) — Receiver Isaac Bruce agreed to a two-year deal with the San Francisco 49ers on Friday night, one day after the St. Louis Rams released one of the most prolific receivers in NFL history.

[slow motion voice]No.................[/slow motion voice]

Greaaaat... $6 million over two years? Let's see...at 20 catches per year, that works out to $150,000 per catch. Nice pickup, guys. :rollem:

BTW, I love how Raiderfan spends all off-season praying for Alcula to step-aside or do the right thing and die. Then come free agent time, all of a sudden he's a "wizard" again.

Raiderfan, although sad and pathetic to a degree seen nowhere else in sports, is consistent and dependable...for providing off-season humor.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:25 pm

Shoalzie wrote: With the latest rumors about Daunte and Randy wanted to play together again...I wonder what team wants to take a chance on Culpepper. Plus, there's no guarantee that Moss won't flip out again or quit on his team. It seemed like the perfect situation in New England...they just couldn't take care of business in Glendale.

Overshadowing the "perfect situation" in NE is the simple fact that he's 31, playing for his last big contract, and just busted the TD record last season. His value will NEVER be higher than it is right now-and the *'s are renowned for being cheap motherfuckers for the most part.

Theres no way in hell they'd give Candy 20-30 million guaranteed-and he knows it, which is why he's "frustrated" with the lack of negotiating on NE's part according to NFL.com. He's going to the highest bidder, period.

As far as Pepp goes-he played admirably for us last season, befriended and mentored JRuss and gave him many useful pointers and tips.....but he's a middle of the pack QB after that shredded knee. His lack of elusiveness took a huge dimension of his game away, but i'd welcome him back in a heartbeat if he wanted to back JRuss up because he was a very positive influence in the locker room, fierce competitor, and everyone really loved the guy.

No way in hell I think that will happen though, and there will always be a team in need of a quality guy like Pep under center.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:36 pm

OCmike wrote:
BTW, I love how Raiderfan spends all off-season praying for Alcula to step-aside or do the right thing and die. Then come free agent time, all of a sudden he's a "wizard" again.

I may not like the motherfucker in any capacity, but he is what he is-and his strengths lie in his "wizardry" of the cap (we've never experienced "cap hell"-can you say the same? Didnt fucking think so.) and being able to negotiate very, very well (A head coach for money and multiple draft picks over multiple years? Crazy.)

But thats where it stops-his FA choices leave much to be desired, his drafting ability is abysmal, as is his willingness to put his fucking ego in front of the team and coaches. I've said how I feel multiple times about The Count-but the bottom line is that he's our owner and we cant control the moves he makes.

Just like how your shitstain owner has assured wine sipping pussy ass 9er fan that they'll NEVER see another title for a few more decades.

Raiderfan, although sad and pathetic to a degree seen nowhere else in sports, is consistent and dependable...for providing off-season humor.

Coming from 9er cunt, this is laugh out loud funny. Fuck your sissy ass faggot fans, fuck your pathetic team, and fuck you old man.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:44 pm

GAY GOES SOUTH

After two frenetic days of free agency, Sunday was shaping up to be a lot slower.

So much for that.

The Patriots have lost cornerback Randall Gay to New Orleans, according to Adam Schefter of NFL Network.

Gay has agreed to terms on a four-year, $17.8 million deal, which includes a $3.75 million signing bonus and $6.9 million in guaranteed money.

It's not a jaw-dropping deal, but it further damages the defending AFC champions. And Gay figures to be an improvement over Jason David, who performed like a piece of French (Quarter) Toast for the Saints in 2007

Nice signing by the Taints.

The Pats are fucked now.

Eugene Wilson is visiting the Bucs, Steelers and Titans.......if he bolts, then 75% of the Gaytriots starting secondary are gone.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:48 pm

The Vag Discharge's best, and most clutch postseason RB is now a Falcon:

TURNER TO ATLANTA IS OFFICIAL

The Falcons have announced that they have agreed to terms with free-agent running back Michael Turner.

"We are pleased to be able to add a very talented running back and a player who has produced at a high level in this League when given the opportunity,” said Falcons General Manager Thomas Dimitroff in a press release. "We think he’s ready to take the next step and have a more prominent role in an offense and we are happy he decided that opportunity is going to be here in Atlanta."

Michael Smith of ESPN.com reports that the deal is for six years, and is worth $34.5 million. Also, Turner will get $15 million in guaranteed money.

Excellent news, because it means that they'll likely take Matt Ryan as the new QB face of that franchise if the Dolphins pass on him...............and that means either Dorsey or one the Longs will be available to us.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:09 pm

Raydah James wrote:Nice signing by the Taints.

The Pats are fucked now.

Eugene Wilson is visiting the Bucs, Steelers and Titans.......if he bolts, then 75% of the Gaytriots starting secondary are gone.

Losing Randall Gay is a great free agency "move." We can sign a whole bunch of other dudes who can neither cover nor tackle for much, much less. Furthemore, I hope Eugene Wilson leaves as well. He sucks ass. Did you actually watch any NE games this year? Dude, I don't know where you're getting your info from, but this is addition by subtraction. Their secondary needs a major overhaul. Did you see what the shit QB's from Philly, Baltimore, and a myriad of other subpar hacks did to it?

Good to see #1 Raider Fan

come back with horrible take after horrible take when he knows his shit franchise is in no danger of actually losing this week...

I look forward to October 1st when you give up on the 08 season and go all milk carton again.

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:15 pm

Raydah James wrote: I may not like the motherfucker in any capacity, but he is what he is-and his strengths lie in his "wizardry" of the cap (we've never experienced "cap hell"-can you say the same? Didnt fucking think so.)

No, but we've won four Superbowls since 1984. Can you say the same? Didn't fucking think so.

...and being able to negotiate very, very well (A head coach for money and multiple draft picks over multiple years? Crazy.)

Jesus, that was what...six years ago? That's like giving him props for going yard on Irwindale's shitpipe.

But thats where it stops-his FA choices leave much to be desired, his drafting ability is abysmal

Both of which greatly affect your cap number... In other words, he ain't no cap wizard either.

Just like how your shitstain owner has assured wine sipping pussy ass 9er fan that they'll NEVER see another title for a few more decades.

You forgot "sushi-eating". We done loves us some sushi, muthafucka!

Oh, and this just in... It's been "a few decades" since your last Superbowl victory. Mix in a desk calendar, dipshit.

Coming from 9er cunt, this is laugh out loud funny. Fuck your sissy ass faggot fans, fuck your pathetic team, and fuck you old man.

Fuck my fans? Well, I knew I had a few admirers, but I wouldn't call them "fans" per se... :D The Niners sell out every home game. Have the Raiders had a sellout in the last ten years? (No, Randy Moss doesn't count)

Fuck my "pathetic team"? We may have limped into '08 with a 5-12 record, but the 'Duhs were 4-12 last year!

Nice job KYOA, idiot.

"Old man?" Uh, I was in my 20's when I joined SCIII. Time to wipe the hair gel off your keyboard and update your spreadsheet.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:27 pm

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
Losing Randall Gay is a great free agency "move." We can sign a whole bunch of other dudes who can neither cover nor tackle for much, much less. Furthemore, I hope Eugene Wilson leaves as well. He sucks ass.

Fair enough. The defense's weakness was certainly the secondary (save for Samuel and Harrison), but how badly do the fucking guys who have to take thier place suck if they couldnt beat out these chumps? If you were just "bad" before, your going to be fucking horrific next season unless some moves are made.

I look forward to October 1st when you give up on the 08 season and go all milk carton again.

Probably. This board fucking sucks your wife's horsecock, and my time is better spent at one of the Raider boards i've been a part of for years.

Not to worry-i'll roll in to laugh at the Pats futility and coming punishment when that faggot Walsh exposes you pussies to the 10th degree.

Oh wait, I guess Herm can take part too:

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/footb ... _wave.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

4 years before scandal, Herm Edwards waved to Bill Belichick's camera
Sunday, March 2nd 2008, 4:00 AM

Herm Edwards is now in Kansas City and Donnie Henderson is now in Jacksonville, but they starred in a movie together in 2004 when they worked together with the Jets.

It was a Bill Belichick production called SpyGate: The Early Years.

And to show Belichick they were aware of his shenanigans, Edwards and Henderson looked right into the camera across the sideline and waved hello.......

[/quote][/quote]

Shoalzie · Post by **Shoalzie** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:45 pm

Losing Gay and Samuel would pretty much mean the Pats will go after a DB with that #7, no? They'll go after a vet in free agency but I think grabbing corner with that first round pick is probably their best bet. Unless they want to go with Limas Sweed to compensate for their losses at receiver. What's left, Welker and the tight ends?

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 9:51 pm

Shoalzie wrote:Losing Gay and Samuel would pretty much mean the Pats will go after a DB with that #7, no?

Dunno.......that'd be a slight reach in this particular draft. Mike Jenkins/Antoine Cason would be the pick, obviously.

.m2 · Post by **.m2** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 10:38 pm

Raydah James wrote:
Oh, and we just signed the Niners 2003 first round draft pick in Kwame Harris for our O-line-he'll be a very nice addition to the Zone Blocking Scheme we run.

"Paint Chips".... you are simply the dumbest motherfucker on this board.

The Midwest thanks you. :paul: :paul: :paul:

I found some "highlights" of Kwame Harris.... enjoy.
http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuseacti ... d=12457884

The best off season move by the 49ers in over 5 years. Hands down!

Addition by Subtraction.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Sun Mar 02, 2008 10:59 pm

Raydah James wrote:http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/footb ... _wave.html

From your own article:

"At times, we would wave at the guy that was filming over there," a member of that Jets staff said in September. "We just gave false signals and waved at the camera. I don't know if they picked up our signals or not. We didn't really worry about it too much."

At the Super Bowl, Goodell told the NFL Network, "One of the coaches was actually waving at the camera, so it's clear that teams, to me, recognize that taking signals from another team is something that they do, so they have very complex systems to make sure that they don't allow their plays to be intercepted."

Don't let your own quote kick you in the balls or anything. You and the rest of the cunts keeping on keeping on... much ado about nothing.

Shoalzie · Post by **Shoalzie** » Sun Mar 02, 2008 11:02 pm

Raydah James wrote:
Shoalzie wrote:Losing Gay and Samuel would pretty much mean the Pats will go after a DB with that #7, no?
Dunno.......that'd be a slight reach in this particular draft. Mike Jenkins/Antoine Cason would be the pick, obviously.

Would they rather draft a position of need or double up on position for depth? They do have a veteran linebacker group...I'd understand going after a guy at that position. I figured with the two losses in free agency, it kind of forces their hand to make that position a priority.

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 2:02 am

Kwame Harris??

We just dumped Langston Walker last year, and now we might bring in his black stepbrother?

I want a refund.

Felix · Post by **Felix** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 5:31 am

.m2 wrote: I found some "highlights" of Kwame Harris.... enjoy.
http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuseacti ... d=12457884

good god that dude fucking sucks....and a penalty machine to boot...

nice pick-up by the duh's......

no doubt he'll eventually get JaMarcus killed...

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 6:32 pm

Kwame Harris isnt a Raider, you gaggle of dumbfucks.

The negotiations were abruptly stopped and never finished.

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 6:53 pm

.m2 wrote: The best off season move by the 49ers in over 5 years. Hands down!

Addition by Subtraction.

Agreed. When a team shit-cans a first-rounder, it's either because he's a druggie or that he flat-out sucks.

Harris was good for at least two false starts a game. Too bad the 'Duh didn't sign him...he would've fit right in.

Lames wrote:Probably. This board fucking sucks your wife's horsecock, and my time is better spent at one of the Raider boards i've been a part of for years.

Translation: Once the 'Duhs go 4-12 AGAIN, do you think that I want to spend my time here having to be accountable for their shitty record and actually defending my team? Hell no! I'd rather go to a board and co-miserate with other Raider losers and talk about how great it's going to be next year.

Felix · Post by **Felix** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 7:04 pm

Raydah James wrote:
The negotiations were abruptly stopped and never finished.

props to the duh front office for perusing that video before they signed him.....

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 7:15 pm

OCmike wrote: Translation: Once the 'Duhs go 4-12 AGAIN, do you think that I want to spend my time here having to be accountable for their shitty record and actually defending my team? Hell no! I'd rather go to a board and co-miserate with other Raider losers and talk about how great it's going to be next year.

I laughed.

I miss most of 1 season since this board began and some pathetic cunt who just showed up decides to talk shit?

Oh, but you've been here since SCIII so its all good, right? Except that you havent been. Where the fuck were you all these years when your shitbag team was a laughingstock? How convienient that you roll back in when things are looking semi-deece in whiner land for the first time in a decade.

Dont bother giving your explanation-we know you took time away from the boards because you and your slunt are goddamn losers who couldnt hack it in Cali. You said so yourself in the nearly unreadable Main Forum. Sorry, but my situation was opposite of yours this past year-I was so busy with business that I literally didnt have much time to do anything other than work and play-and I sure as hell wasnt going to use spare party/fuck around with my hottie time to post on a damn BB.

You, on the other hand, tucked your fucking tail between your legs and played your usual role of pussy when the chips were down-and didnt post altogether. You're a fucking failure of a human being and im dead sure your left behind family wouldnt disagree.

Now sit down and shut the fuck up, you spineless cunt-Men are talking football in this thread.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 7:17 pm

mvscal wrote:Somebody must have jingled some keys to distract Alvis before he could sign the deal then quickly whisked it off the table while he was busy with his cup o pudding.

Whatever fucking works, bro.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 7:29 pm

Raydah James wrote:and I sure as hell wasnt going to use spare party/fuck around with my hottie time

Oh yeah, I remember that photo of you two flipping birds at the camera like you were Crown and Tiberious. Anyone still got a link for that photo?

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 7:58 pm

Goober McTuber wrote: Oh yeah, I remember that photo of you two flipping birds at the camera like you were Crown and Tiberious. Anyone still got a link for that photo?

Color me shocked that you're asking for other mens pictures, Herbert McPedo. Tell ya what, Gramps-Turn off the CPU, jam in another shot of your insulin, and turn on Barney for your loser son's kids that you babysit daily........that, or just throw your fucking keyboard against the wall before hitting submit-it'd be marked improvement over the one line shit anklers your liver spotted fingers produce.

You have your first NFL take to give, or are you going to continue cunting this place up as usual?

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 8:02 pm

Raydah James wrote: I miss most of 1 season since this board began and some pathetic cunt who just showed up decides to talk shit?

Awwwwww...is him gonna cwy? I love it when losers in a particular forum take a fucking knee to the grapesack and then whine about that person not being "allowed" to do so because they haven't been a regular. Time to hike up your panties, bitch. This is a smack board. You don't get to pick the people who take shots at your bitch ass. Live with it.

Lames wrote:Oh, but you've been here since SCIII so its all good, right? Except that you havent been. Where the fuck were you all these years when your shitbag team was a laughingstock? How convienient that you roll back in when things are looking semi-deece in whiner land for the first time in a decade.

Things are looking semi-decent in Ninerville? Only a Raiderfan would think a 5-11 season, followed up by a quarterback controversy where your looking-like-a-bust #1 draft pick QB is being challenged by an undrafted free agent who only started one season in college in Shaun Hill and a 6th round pick in 2002 who's played on 7 teams in that time and played his college ball at UC-fucking-Davis in J.T. O'Sullivan equates to "things looking up".

lames wrote:Dont bother giving your explanation-we know you took time away from the boards because you and your slunt are goddamn losers who couldnt hack it in Cali. You said so yourself in the nearly unreadable Main Forum.

I've spent all but 1 1/2 years of my professional career in California IT in OC (one of the most expensive places to live in CA), and now live in the most expensive place in CA, making double the salary that I did in OC. Yeah, CA is really kicking my ass.

Oh, and OL smack is ever so fresh. You forgot to mix in a "Yo mama" epic blast.

Truth is, not only could you not handle a hot half-Spanish/half-American Indian chick who makes kickass money like I do, allowing us to live in CA's most lucrative areas, but the best you can do is attract vapid, single-digit IQ skanks who think that a guy in his twenties who still flips off the camera like a 13 y/o is "cool".

Now go look up "vapid". ______ <------I'll wait right here.

lames wrote:Sorry, but my situation was opposite of yours this past year-I was so busy with business that I literally didnt have much time to do anything other than work and play-and I sure as hell wasnt going to use spare party/fuck around with my hottie time to post on a damn BB.

Reeeeeally? I thought you were spending all of your time on Raider Message Boards instead of here. Nice job KYOA, you fucking liar.

Oh, and this just in: A chick with an 8 for a body, but whose face is a solid deuce, is not a "hottie".

Lames wrote:You, on the other hand, tucked your fucking tail between your legs and played your usual role of pussy when the chips were down-and didnt post altogether.

Yeah, either that or every time I'd post a Niner or NFC West thread very few people would read or respond to it. Even you should be able to figure this out, even with all of the Aquanet fumes you've inhaled. See, with the exception of KFCPaul, who was a bandwagon Rams fan when they won their Superbowl, there aren't any fucking Rams fans on this board. There also aren't any Seahawk fans and there sure as FUCK aren't any AZ Cardinal fans here. So you tell me smart guy... Who do I have to talk to and what the fuck do I have to talk about?

The best I can do is read more and post less and occasionally snipe from the sidelines, which is what I'm doing in this thread. And if that means that you get your Leggs hoisery hiked up into your inner labia, so fucking be it.

Lames wrote:You're a fucking failure of a human being and im dead sure your left behind family wouldnt disagree.

Yeah, cause you know me, right? Okay.

Not to go Mike Tyson, but a superficial pussy like you wouldn't last five minutes in my world.

Oh, and Lames? You see that big white flag waving above your head? That's you pulling the fucking pussy move of grabbing info from another forum and trying to use it to smack me here because you've got no answers for my football smack.

Lames wrote:Now sit down and shut the fuck up, you spineless cunt-Men are talking football in this thread.

Men don't wear eyeliner and they don't duck entire posts...especially from a 49ers fan. What a pussy.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 8:08 pm

Raydah James wrote: You have your first NFL take to give, or are you going to continue cunting this place up as usual?

You mean like Robert Gallery sucking as a tackle then finding himself at guard? You seem to be wound a little tight today, Punkass Jizzmopper.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 8:24 pm

OCmike wrote: I've spent all but 1 1/2 years of my professional career in California IT in OC (one of the most expensive places to live in CA), and now live in the most expensive place in CA, making double the salary that I did in OC. Yeah, CA is really kicking my ass.

If I can stop laughing long enough after reading this, i'll address the rest of the shitsplat you offered.

So renting a room from "Something about Mary's" Magda counts as "making it in Cali" now?!?

Tears Jerry, Tears.

I own a kickass home on the water in Carlsbad, complete with all the big boy toys to enjoy it with. My daily driver of a car alone would make you fucking weep, old man. My woman is a straight 10 of hot blondie who also doubles as my Drummer. Meanwhile, you're starting threads about your "roomate" being a fucking psychotic, while your wife and the unfortunate spawn that hit paydirt are many states away waiting for your hair club for men ass to "make it in Cali" and "hook wifey" up with a job so you can scrape up enough cayshe to rent a duplex.

Cant. Stop. Laughing.

Sucks that a youngin like myself has your ass kicked all over the place in the game of life, huh?

Yeah dude, you've got total fucking :bode:

You dont want to play this game with me, Grandma's Boy. If I was as much a fucking failure as you were, i'd buy a nice policy and off myself to save my family the pain of the undeniable future failings and fuckups they'd have to deal with.

As far as our teams go, we'll just have to wait and see what happens this coming season. The 9ers have made some nice moves, and look poised to do something meaningful. A playoff berth wouldnt surprise me. I can easily say the same about my team, since we lost 7 games on the last drive this past year.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 8:46 pm

Raydah James wrote:My woman is a straight 10 of hot blondie who also doubles as my Drummer.

And here I thought I was the only one who has dated a chick who plays drums. She turned out to be a little fucked in the head, but she could pull chrome off a trailer hitch. Last I heard she was doing time for an armed robbery that she and the dude she dated after me tried to pull. So I guess I got out in time.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 8:56 pm

BSmack wrote:
Raydah James wrote:My woman is a straight 10 of hot blondie who also doubles as my Drummer.
And here I thought I was the only one who has dated a chick who plays drums. She turned out to be a little fucked in the head, but she could pull chrome off a trailer hitch. Last I heard she was doing time for an armed robbery that she and the dude she dated after me tried to pull. So I guess I got out in time.

They're a different breed altogether-but she's a damn good woman and extremely smart to boot. "Chrome off a trailer hitch" and "Fucking freak" is pretty much universal when talking of women in bands. Good on you for getting out when you did, Bri.

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 9:22 pm

Raydah James wrote: If I can stop laughing long enough after reading this, i'll address the rest of the shitsplat you offered. So renting a room from "Something about Mary's" Magda counts as "making it in Cali" now?!?

No, you won't. You'll duck it like you have every other time in this thread by tossing up a bunch of lies that sound like they came off of some over-compensating loser's myspace page and see if anything sticks.

Oh, lookie here...what a surprise:

Lames wrote:I own a kickass home on the water in Carlsbad, complete with all the big boy toys to enjoy it with.

"Big boy toys"? Oh, good lord. Lemme guess...you've got a 1987 sputtering jetski with one of these on the side, right?

And freaking Carlsbad? Ooooh...Bode you. Maybe someone who doesn't know SoCal might be impressed by you bragging about a crib on the water in Carlsbad

, but I'm not. Hell, I'd be more impressed if you said you had a 2br/2ba with a community laundry room in Mission Viejo than some dump right next door to gangland in Oceanside.

Do you keep red and blue bandanas in the glove box so you can switch them as you cross into a different neighborhood? Carlsbad...

Lames wrote:My daily driver of a car alone would make you fucking weep, old man.

Nothing screams overcompensating loser like running "I have a better car than you" smack. Whatsamataa, Lames? Not comfortable in your own skin? It's okay, lots of people dress like 1990's goths with a 1970's haircut... Or none at all, but definitely one of the two.

I've got two vehicles, both of which are less than 2 years old. But yeah, you've brought me to tears with your rusty '66 Mustang with spinner rims that trails blue smoke and tranny fluid behind it down the highway.

Lames wrote:My woman is a straight 10 of hot blondie who also doubles as my Drummer.

Stop...just...stop. Dude, we've seen your picture. The day you can pull what someone else considers a 10 is the day I lose faith in all of womankind.

Meanwhile, you're starting threads about your "roomate" being a fucking psychotic, while your wife and the unfortunate spawn that hit paydirt are many states away waiting for your hair club for men ass to "make it in Cali" and "hook wifey" up with a job so you can scrape up enough cayshe to rent a duplex.

I'm scoping out the area and getting dirt cheap rent while I find the perfect digs for the family. We responsible types have a term for that...it's called "being smart". Sure, I could have gone the RJ route, loaded up the U-haul with cases of hair gel, Tag body spray, various colors of wifebeaters and said, "We're going to live....here!", while throwing a dart at a map. But since I know exactly squat about the South Bay, I'm checking out the area first while I bank a couple of paychecks.

Yeah, it sucks living with a potential serial killer, but I'm not worried about her attacking me at night...I've got the awareness of a fucking ninja...and I put a chair in front of the door so I'll have some advance warning. :D Anyway, she weighs 110 soaking wet and is 47 years old. If it came down to it and she charged me with a knife, she'd have it sticking out of her uterus as I lobbed her off the balcony onto the hood of some other overcompensating loser's 1970 Chevelle (one of his "big boy toys"

).

Cant. Stop. Laughing.

That. Was. Old. Six. Months. Ago.

Lames wrote:Sucks that a youngin like myself has your ass kicked all over the place in the game of life, huh?

I'm happily over-married, have an awesome kid, a six-figure income and live in one of the most upscale areas in the US...while you're dating a butterface drummer, drive a 40 y/o vehicle and live in Carlsbad. Yeah, bode you.

Post more emoticons. Really. They've got everyone convinced.

BTW, where's the part where you're going to start addressing the rest of me kicking your ass up and down this thread. Big surprise, it's conspicuously absent.

You dont want to play this game with me, Grandma's Boy.

Oh, but I do! I love making superficial losers like you get bent out of shape and resort to pathetic ramblings like, "Uh...uh...I've got better stuff than you do!!" :D Makes my fucking day.

Lames wrote:If I was as much a fucking failure as you were, i'd buy a nice policy and off myself to save my family the pain of the undeniable future failings and fuckups they'd have to deal with.

I know...because you're a quitter and a loser, whereas I'm a survivor and a winner. Which is exactly why I said you'd last less than five minutes in my world. Thanks for confirming what I already knew.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 9:45 pm

OCMike wrote:

If you claim it, it will come.

I also wasnt aware that you're the only one on this board who pulls in a six figure income....oh wait, you're not. If that is true, then it really tells me how much of a monumentally inept fuckup you truly are. Yeah, its a harder hit in that particular tax bracket, but there is absolutely NO goddamn excuse for being the situation you're in. Unless you're just "trolling", right?

Fucking tard. Talk all the shit you want, but fucking trash like yourself couldnt afford to live where I do....but your wife could probably find a job cleaning houses on our cul de sack and peddling oranges off the fucking Tamarack freeway offramp.

Bottom line: your life fucking sucks. Remember that when you kiss your wife goodnight this evening..........whoops! I mean Magda.

For the sake of your family, Deep throat a shotgun immediately.

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 10:25 pm

Raydah James wrote: If you claim it, it will come.

Translation: If I keep ducking him, maybe he'll stop posting in this thread.

Fucking pussy.

Lames wrote:I also wasnt aware that you're the only one on this board who pulls in a six figure income....oh wait, you're not.

Unlike you, who value your own life based on how you compare to others, I could give two shits about what other people make.

Lames wrote:If that is true, then it really tells me how much of a monumentally inept fuckup you truly are. Yeah, its a harder hit in that particular tax bracket, but there is absolutely NO goddamn excuse for being the situation you're in.

You're right. You're totally and completely right. That is...unless my brain doesn't properly regulate chemicals, resulting in me getting medically-untreatable episodes of severe depression that can last for years and suffering from a genetic condition that was oh-so-thought fully passed down from the maternal side of my family called "Schizoaffective Disorder".
_____ <---I'll wait here while you go look that up.

A pussy like you in that situation would have swallowed the barrel of a gun years ago. But unlike you, I'm not a fucking quitter. I, like other members of my family, kick complete ass at whatever I do. Which is why no matter what kind of fucked up bullshit life may throw at my half-crazy ass, *I* will always end up back on top of the fucking pile, while piss-ant pieces of shit like you would have been lowered in a closed casket with people standing around saying, "What a waste..." fucking years ago.

Lames wrote:Unless you're just "trolling", right?

Dude, that shit's for stoners and junior high kids.

Fucking tard. Talk all the shit you want, but fucking trash like yourself couldnt afford to live where I do....

Aw, did I strike a nerve?

Dude, I'm right down the street from Cisco, Google, McAfee, NASA and Yahoo....I think I can afford a place in fucking Carlsbad.

BTW, NASA stands for National Aeronautics and...nevermind.

...but your wife could probably find a job cleaning houses on our cul de sack and peddling oranges off the fucking Tamarack freeway offramp.

There's a difference between people from Spain and people from Mexico. Tell me you kn...ah, who are we kidding. Here, I'll help:

See, Spain is in Europe and... You know, the rest of us learned this shit in the 8th grade. Where the fuck were you?

Lames wrote:Bottom line: your life fucking sucks. Remember that when you kiss your wife goodnight this evening..........whoops! I mean Magda.

No, my life doesn't suck. It's just more difficult some days than others. But like I said before, I'm a fucking survivor. See, unlike someone like you, who'd get his quitter ass sent weeping down to double-A ball, I put in the time in the batting cage until I learned how to hit a fucking slider, which is why I'm back in the show making a six-figure income.

You see, we OC's are like marines: We don't quit...we just go to Texas and re-group.

Lames wrote:For the sake of your family, Deep throat a shotgun immediately.

Gee, James, you've got suicide on your mind a lot today. Is that how a pussy like you deals with difficulties in life? Lay down and quit?

"Waaaaah...my neighbor just got new quads for him and his Old Lady. My life fucking sucks! What's the point anymore?"

"Awwww...man! My girlfriend got taken away by some guy who doesn't use tan-in-a-bottle and take pictures of himself naked. I wish I was dead!"

If you'd trade in your ovaries for a set of fucking nuts, you'd know that only someone with your outlook on life and someone who values the things that you do is capable of offing themselves.

Raydah James · Post by **Raydah James** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 11:00 pm

OCmike wrote:

You see, we OC's are like marines: We don't quit...we just go to Texas and re-group.

SEE: Tuck tail between the legs, run as fast as you can to another state after getting your faggot ass handed to you, and then promptly drag your prolapsed colon back to the state that raw dogged it in the first place.

You moved because you're an utter dumbfuck who either A) Isnt smart enough to financially plan correctly, B) Are a complete and total failure at your job and life, C) A fucking blatant liar, or D) All of the above.

Common sense dictates that it is absolutely D.

The cold hard truth is that you rent a fucking room from a 102 year old clinically pyschotic woman. You embarked on this pathetic feat because you and your dumbfuck wife couldnt hack it in Cali to begin with........that much has been revealed. I know plenty of six figure income folks *raises hand* who have never had to think twice about uprooting thier families and being a fucking nomad.......why? Because they make wise decisions with thier money.

You obviously didnt. That, or you just dont make that kind of coin and are fronting. At this point, I could give a fuck-you're pathetic either goddamn way.

Your Stuart Smalley "Darnit, We're good enough-we just move to Texas and start over" bullshit rant isnt even believed by yourself, let alone anyone on these boards. It gave me a good laugh, though.

Mike wrote: Gee, James, you've got suicide on your mind a lot today. Is that how a pussy like you deals with difficulties in life? Lay down and quit?

Hey, it seems a viable option for a lobotamized gimp like yourself who cant be bothered to do something as simple as take care of his finances correctly.

Riddle me this, Male Pattern Mikeness-which one of us will be walking into our waterfront crib that they own and laying thier head to rest on thier own pillow, and which one will be sitting on a plastic covered couch trying to drug Magda's dog to get a date with Mary?

Does Magda request Werthers Butterscotches with her rent?

You're fucking cancelled, Douchdrizzle.

Get back to me when you've got a leg to stand on here and arent helping Gram's fill out $12 birthday checks to her Grandkids, you fucking laughable loser.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 11:22 pm

RACK! the smackoff getting started early in the NFL forum. Good stuff, and for all intent and purpose, about 10 times better than anything we'll read in the contrived contests.

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Mon Mar 03, 2008 11:38 pm

OCnike wrote:Translation: Once the 'Duhs go 4-12 AGAIN, do you think that I want to spend my time here having to be accountable for their shitty record and actually defending my team? Hell no! I'd rather go to a board and co-miserate with other Raider losers and talk about how great it's going to be next year.

Please tell me I didn't really read that.

Yes, James pretty much missed the 2nd half of last season.
And also, YES, James has been a staple of this forum during the previous 2-14, 4-12, 5-11 and 4-12 seasons his Raiders endured.

Making the accusation that he somehow 'bailed' on his team, while YOU YOURSELF have seldom shown face in this forum since TNW, which was... oh, coincidentally :rolleyesthingy: ... the last time the whiners fielded anything other than a bottom-feeding pile of horseshit team, makes you look like a hypocritical babbling bandwagon j@ck@ss.

....... with a six-figure income. :more rolleyesthingy:

Save your gay 'I didn't post because my team felched majorly' during the past 6 years' excuse.
It doesn't get off the ground.

If you are a pro football fan, you'll post.
If you're a bandwagon rah rah fluff-guy fan, you'll post when your team is doing some winning.

We've seen what category you fall into.

So save your sanctimonious bullshit for naive ears which aren't to be found in here, you bandwagon douche-nozzle.

Now go pick up your ice bucket and Gideon's Bible, and pray that your rabbit ears will position sufficiently so you can catch Magnum PI reruns tonight, mr six figure.

And please don't get axe-murdered in your sleep tonight.

Heeeeeeeeere's Sybil!!!!!!!!!!!

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Mar 04, 2008 1:08 am

How do you make six figures wiping sweat off of exercise equipment at Bally's? Oh yeah, by counting the places after the decimal point.

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Tue Mar 04, 2008 1:13 am

Raydah James wrote: SEE: Tuck tail between the legs, run as fast as you can to another state after getting your faggot ass handed to you, and then promptly drag your prolapsed colon back to the state that raw dogged it in the first place.

=

Raydah James wrote:You're gay.

When all else fails, go for the 'ole standby, eh Lames?

Lames wrote:You moved because you're an utter dumbfuck who either A) Isnt smart enough to financially plan correctly, B) Are a complete and total failure at your job and life, C) A fucking blatant liar, or D) All of the above.

You tell me, smart guy. How much does a computer programming job pay in the silicon valley where there are a shitload of people who know healthcare and a shitload of people who know IT, but virtually no one who knows both? I'll give you a hint: A lot.

Lames wrote:Common sense dictates that it is absolutely D.

The only thing "common" is the knowledge that you have no fucking "sense". Clearly you've inhaled way to many mousse propellants to have an informed opinion about anything. And no, "Mousse propellant" has nothing to do with throwing a chocolate dessert at someone, dumbass.

Lames wrote:The cold hard truth is that you rent a fucking room from a 102 year old clinically pyschotic woman.

I can just see you pounding out that post: "...you rent a room from a 102 year old clinically pshy...psy...FUCK...phys...MOTHERFUCKER!!....uh, fuck it 'pyschotic'." Dude, as a piece of friendly advice, stay away from non-monosyllabic smack. You're just going to embarrass yourself. I know you don't know what that means. Ask a smart person.

Lames wrote:You embarked on this pathetic feat because you and your dumbfuck wife couldnt hack it...

Look, first off, it's "pethetic feet", not "pathetic feat"($5 says he believes me...Psst, Lames, don't read that....Crap, Oot), secondly, I'll bet my wife and her 15 years of healthcare IT experience pulls in more scratch than your drumming fucksleeve girlfriend.

Lames wrote:You embarked on this pathetic feat because you and your dumbfuck wife couldnt hack it in Cali to begin with........that much has been revealed.

Okay, bro, there's this thing in English, you know, the language? Yeah, there's this thing called an "ellipses" and it's got 3 "."'s in it. Three, not eight. One, two...yeah.

Now, I embarked on this pethetic feet (snicker) because I was moving from Texas back to California, not the other way around. I don't want people going around saying I'm not a nice guy, so here you go: Google Maps: Austin to San Jose.

Lames wrote: I know plenty of six figure income folks *raises hand* who have never had to think twice about uprooting thier families and being a fucking nomad.......why? Because they make wise decisions with thier money.

Okay, smart guy, so what do you do when you save your coin for a rainy day, that day comes and it fucking pours til the cash is gone? If you're me, you go where there's work that you can do.

I guess you would have just limped back home and moved back in with your fucking parents.

And let's not get carried away, Lames. To you, "uprooting your family" means asking your whore drummer girlfriend if she wants to go sing karaoke at another shithole Carlsbad bar.

Lames wrote:You obviously didnt. That, or you just dont make that kind of coin and are fronting. At this point, I could give a fuck-you're pathetic either goddamn way.

Lames, we're white. Caucasian, even. We don't "front". We might make stuff up...hell, we might even lie or embellish here and there. But under no circumstances do we "front". I know, I know...now I'm "actin' the fool", right? No, I won't chest-bump you, so stop asking.

Lames wrote:Your Stuart Smalley "Darnit, We're good enough-we just move to Texas and start over" bullshit rant isnt even believed by yourself, let alone anyone on these boards. It gave me a good laugh, though.

Don't even fucking think about going to the "everyone else" card, you fucking pussy. This is between you and me. Oh, you can try to circle the wagons and send PMs and text messages until you've got tendonitis in your dickhand, but I don't give a shit. It's a pussy move, but I'm not surprised since your fag/cunt/ass-ream/bode train has come to a screeching halt. It's a bitch when you run out of original material after two posts, eh, Lames?

Lames wrote:Hey, it seems a viable option for a lobotamized gimp like yourself who cant be bothered to do something as simple as take care of his finances correctly.

Look, bro...I've tried to be patient with you. I've made recommendations and even offered some suggestions and advice, but it's just not going well for you.

It's "lobotomized"...you know, like lobotomy? Same word, just with a different extension on it. I told you, I'm here to help.

Now, when we bought my son the "Phonics" set when he started Kindergarten I know I saw at the store that they had sets that went up through the sixth grade. I'll check back and see if they have a "Slope-headed, slack-jawed twenty-somethings who are too fucking dumb to spell their way out of a paper bag"-edition.

Also, a "gimp" is someone who walks with a limp, which means that it doesn't have anything to do with severing the nerves on the frontal lobe of a person's brain. I know you don't have any idea what that has to do with the price of tea in China, and are like, "frontal, wah?", but trust me, it's relevant to the conversation.

Riddle me this, Male Pattern Mikeness

A random/completely out of left field Batman reference followed by quite possibly the worst bald joke ever in the history of mankind? WOW. Did you hear that resounding THUNK? That was the bucket being lowered into your smack well, Lames, and hitting nothing but fucking dirt. Jesus H. Christo, the least you could do is call me OCBaldi-locks or something remotely funny. Hell, call a friend and say, "What's a funny name for a guy with a receding hairline?" Do SOMETHING! But tighten it up, for Christ's sake.

Lames wrote:...which one of us will be walking into our waterfront crib that they own and laying thier head to rest on thier own pillow...

Just because your Crip neighbor left his sprinklers on overnight causing the runoff to flow through the gutter in front of your house does not make it a "waterfront crib".

Lames wrote:and which one will be sitting on a plastic covered couch trying to drug Magda's dog to get a date with Mary?

Okay, seriously, I can't fucking take it anymore. That's like the fourth fucking TSAM refrence. At this point, even the shittiest of poster with the most marginal smack skills would have taken out the coleman fuel, tossed that shit right on the fucking campfire and lobbed a couple of Kingpin references my way. Come on, man! Get in the fucking game! God you suck at this. You could have dropped a "Ooooh...I think you knocked something loose there, tiger" and added salt to the wound with a "What is it about great sex that makes you want to take a crap". At this point, it's truly pethetic(shhhhh!...snicker).

Lames wrote:Does Magda request Werthers Butterscotches with her rent?

No, but she does ask that you stop using the same fucking retread reference every goddamn post.

Lames wrote:You're fucking cancelled, Douchdrizzle.

And if you had any fucking sense, you would have realized that your tired and predictable cunt/you're a fag/cum/shitpipe/vag act is completely fucking outclassed in this thread.

Lames wrote:Get back to me when you've got a leg to stand on here and arent helping Gram's fill out $12 birthday checks to her Grandkids, you fucking laughable loser.

Get back to me when you can afford a piece of real estate outside of fucking Carlsbad.

Hell, even Mikey has real estate bode on you and he lives in freaking Fallbrook!

OCmike · Post by **OCmike** » Tue Mar 04, 2008 1:32 am

poptart wrote: Please tell me I didn't really read that.

Yes, James pretty much missed the 2nd half of last season.
And also, YES, James has been a staple of this forum during the previous 2-14, 4-12, 5-11 and 4-12 seasons his Raiders endured.

Well, he only gets marginal credit for that, seeing how if we overlook a couple of Gruden/Gannon seasons, the Raiders have gone 5-11 or 4-12 pretty much every year since 1983. :D

Tart wrote:Making the accusation that he somehow 'bailed' on his team, while YOU YOURSELF have seldom shown face in this forum since TNW, which was... oh, coincidentally :rolleyesthingy: ... the last time the whiners fielded anything other than a bottom-feeding pile of horseshit team, makes you look like a hypocritical babbling bandwagon j@ck@ss.

Read a little further into the thread and you'll see that I explain quite clearly that no one here really gives two shits about NFC West football or 49er football (other than mTool). I'm not going to rehash the whole thing here just because you're too lazy to read the entire thread before posting.

Tart wrote:....... with a six-figure income. :more rolleyesthingy:

Maybe we can get Orc to open up a remedial English class. Either you and Lames have no fucking clue how to type an ellipses or you're licking a 9-volt battery right when your finger goes for the "." button. If it's the former, Dinsdale will be offering a clinic in Cul de Smack until a new forum is opened. If it's the latter, well, knock it off.

And I didn't say shit about my income until he started bragging about his gangland crib off of a sewage treatment plant drainage ditch and his Country Squire Wagon with wood paneling.

Anyway, you don't have to believe me, but it doesn't take a fucking genius to figure out that I wouldn't have picked up and moved halfway across the US for $20/hour.

Tart wrote:Save your gay 'I didn't post because my team felched majorly' during the past 6 years' excuse.
It doesn't get off the ground.

If you are a pro football fan, you'll post.
If you're a bandwagon rah rah fluff-guy fan, you'll post when your team is doing some winning.

I've posted in here many times. When I post about my team, no one gives a fuck, so I stopped posting about them.

And how do you figure that I'm a bandwagon Rah-rah guy when the Niners went 5-11 last year?! I mean, I guess by Raiders standards, that's at least an average season, but the rest of us set higher standards for success than that.

Tart wrote:We've seen what category you fall into.

So save your sanctimonious bullshit for naive ears which aren't to be found in here, you bandwagon douche-nozzle.

Yeah, I'm such a bandwagon douch-nozzle that I wear my Niners jersey that Mom bought me from NFL.com for Christmas a few years ago with MY last name on it (snifff....war her), win or lose. In fact, my team still sucks so bad that when I wear my Niner gear out to the mall or somewhere else in public I have complete strangers come up to me and say, "Wow, you must be a true fan, buddy. Heh heh heh."

Tart wrote:Now go pick up your ice bucket and Gideon's Bible, and pray that your rabbit ears will position sufficiently so you can catch Magnum PI reruns tonight, mr six figure.

If you are going to take me to task for talking about what I make, you'd better do the same to James for boasting about his ghetto meth house with a puddle of piss left by some homeless guy out in front.

RevLimiter · Post by **RevLimiter** » Tue Mar 04, 2008 1:34 am

L-R: OCMike (holding the ugly stick), Raydah Lames

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Mar 04, 2008 1:50 am

If you string together all of Raider Jimmy's disparate claims over the years, of what he does for a living, all of the toys he has, etc., you'd have to assume that he is:

a. A trust fund baby
b. The extremely orally-gifted concubine of a west coast captain of industry

Felix · Post by **Felix** » Tue Mar 04, 2008 2:42 am

so anywhoo (segue)......the Broncos need some help on the o-line.......