U&L Survival Essentials

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:43 pm

Besides the usual stuff, like first aid kits, flashlights, matches, etc., what should one carry whether hiking Mt. Hood in a whiteout or getting lost on an unmaintained road in the Coastal Range? I'd like to know because if I ever happen to be in one of these situations I don't want to end up like the poor "out of staters" that stumbled into the strange and wonderful world of a U&L winter this week.

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:44 pm

Mikey wrote:Besides the usual stuff, like first aid kits, flashlights, matches, etc., what should one carry whether hiking Mt. Hood in a whiteout or getting lost on an unmaintained road in the Coastal Range? I'd like to know because if I ever happen to be in one of these situations I don't want to end up like the poor "out of staters" that stumbled into the strange and wonderful world of a U&L winter this week.

I figgered you wanted to know in case Alex Trebek asks.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:45 pm

I would have asked it in the form of an answer.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:46 pm

I was thinking maybe some extra food, like energy bars or something, but anybody who's worth a shit should be able to catch a huge fresh chinook just about anywhere around there. Maybe you should carry a cedar plank to cook it on, just in case.

Atomic Punk · Post by **Atomic Punk** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:52 pm

Hiking right?

GPS or at least a compass
local terrain map
clothing suitable for those temperatures
appropriate boots
strobe light (easy for rescue aircraft to spot)
MRE's
plenty of water
sleeping bag rated for the temperatures
orange or bright colored tent

for starters...

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:53 pm

RUN PUPPET, RUN!

Ken · Post by **Ken** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 10:58 pm

Atomic Punk wrote:Hiking right?

GPS or at least a compass
local terrain map
clothing suitable for those temperatures
appropriate boots
strobe light (easy for rescue aircraft to spot)
MRE's
plenty of water
sleeping bag rated for the temperatures
orange or bright colored tent

for starters...

Is this where I put one of those

"Sin,
No fucking shit"

thingies?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:00 pm

What about some good local microbrew?

Atomic Punk · Post by **Atomic Punk** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:07 pm

Well, see the great advice of having the gear I've posted is that prior to hiking you plot the LAT/LONG of all of the local microbreweries into your GPS so that you can have that survival instinct and navigate towrd one.

Win Win.

Milner · Post by **Milner** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:09 pm

shit, I thought all those frickin' Oregonians drank was Olympia or some frickin' stuff like that, shit.

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:11 pm

Mikey wrote:Besides the usual stuff, like first aid kits, flashlights, matches, etc., what should one carry whether hiking Mt. Hood in a whiteout or getting lost on an unmaintained road in the Coastal Range?

As soon as it's on the market, and if I was planning on Kimming it I'd buy the Dinsdale Talking Head Doll, provided it comes with a handy off switch and the ability to mute the "I told you so" and the "up here in the U & L we..." rants.

Quad McWheels · Post by **Quad McWheels** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:11 pm

if you're a guy who snapped his spine kicking some MAJOR ass on your HS football kickoff coverage unit, don't forget:

Extra battery for motorized wheelchair
Chains for tires
Someone who can fucking swap that shit out for you

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:13 pm

Quad McWheels wrote:if you're a guy who snapped his spine kicking some MAJOR ass on your HS football kickoff coverage unit, don't forget:

Extra battery for motorized wheelchair
Chains for tires
Someone who can fucking swap that shit out for you

and for those of us having to read this shit, an icy cliff.

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:17 pm

A friendly deer with a glowing red nose worked pretty well a few years back.

Yukon Cornelius · Post by **Yukon Cornelius** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:19 pm

A good supply of peppermint!!

Mister Bushice · Post by **Mister Bushice** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:26 pm

Blitzen wrote:A friendly deer

I call bullshit.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:35 pm

Mister Bushice wrote:
Blitzen wrote:A friendly deer
I call bullshit.

AP stealing your spotlight, Crash? Don't worry, there are still 13 days left until we kick and spin. Plenty of time to get your rectum prolapsed.

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 12:29 am

A brain instead of a heart for starters.

Sincerely,

The Tin Man

or how about this:

Just stay the fuck out of Oregon, if you intend to get lost and put a burden on our emergency services.

Come, spend your money and then fucking leave.

Sincerely,

Gov. Tom McCall.

( Noted Oregon Gov, drunk, hippie lover, bottle bill sponser)

Atomic Punk · Post by **Atomic Punk** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:22 am

Jsc810 wrote:Video - Essential items you need to survive when stranded

I clicked onto that link and watched it while thinking another government worker getting a paycheck for not knowing her ass other than when Homie taps it.. Might as well be a Korean internet guru if you buy into that clueless bullshit advice. I'll bet the AA/EO government infused worker has had extensive training to be able to stumble through that presentation. Wow!

I've heard there are at least a few books out there you can read to simplify the concept of basic survival.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 1:29 pm

Roach is correct. Most of the folks who
get into problems did so because they looked
on a map for a short cut and ran into trouble.
Even on major highways, you can run off the road
like that couple did on I-95 recently. Back in CNY
folks there are aware of the risk of lake effect snow
where you can be driving along say I-81 with
blue skies and the next thing you know, you're in a
white out snow band.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:03 pm

Atomic Punk wrote:Well, see the great advice of having the gear I've posted is that prior to hiking you plot the LAT/LONG of all of the local microbreweries into your GPS so that you can have that survival instinct and navigate towrd one.

Win Win.

Obviously you're a Californian. Otherwise you would know that great microbrews can be picked from the trees any damn time we want them. Stay the hell out of our state.

-Dins

jiminphilly · Post by **jiminphilly** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:17 pm

A friend who knows someone about something who can get you something for half the price or even free.

Trampis · Post by **Trampis** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 4:26 pm

Im not so sure asking Oregonians how to survive is such a good idea seeing how they cant even pump there own gas.

Uncle Fester · Post by **Uncle Fester** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 4:45 pm

Bring your banjo and a 30-pack of Hamm's.

At least you'll have happy tunes and a quality American macrobrew to quaff as you freeze to death.

Tom In VA · Post by **Tom In VA** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 4:47 pm

Uncle Fester wrote:Bring your banjo and a 30-pack of Hamm's.

At least you'll have happy tunes and a quality American macrobrew to quaff as you freeze to death.

Tell me you're in marketting, if not, you should be. Hamm's would PAY you good money for those kind of ideas.

Uncle Fester · Post by **Uncle Fester** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 5:57 pm

No I'm not, but I'm willing to learn.

I'll be out of job at the end of the year.

Trampis · Post by **Trampis** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:01 pm

Uncle Fester wrote:
I'll be out of job at the end of the year.

Tell those dweebs at the UN to go fuck themselves Mr Bolten.

Tom In VA · Post by **Tom In VA** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:04 pm

Uncle Fester wrote:No I'm not, but I'm willing to learn.

I'll be out of job at the end of the year.

I'll write a letter. I never wanted a Hamm's before, I'm almost willing to give up four years on the wagon, to try a Hamm's.

Something about your writing.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:04 pm

Good things to have --

An appropriate vehicle for where you're going.

4 chains for the vehicle.

A winch or come-along with plenty of rope.

Topo map, and a compass never hurts to go along with it. Give me a compass, a topo, and any sort of visibility, and I'll never be lost. Ain't rocket science.

You know...pretty much all the stuff I listed in the other thread...duh.

But leave it to you green horns to not figure it out...don't go anywhere where your chances of becoming stranded are extremely high.

Sure, I've done it...and paid for it. But I didn't bring infants along for the ride, so it didn't result in nearly the drama. Don't think I've ever gotten so fucked in the woods that I couldn't solve the problem on the same day, or within 12-18 hours at least. A lot of it revolves not being a city-slicker pussy.

420 · Post by **420** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:06 pm

Uncle Fester wrote:No I'm not, but I'm willing to learn.

I'll be out of job at the end of the year.

I'm looking for an apprentice.

Do you like to drink a bunch, and pretend to work?

If you feel you can fill the above qualifications... you may be our guy in the Minnesota division.

Uncle Fester · Post by **Uncle Fester** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 6:11 pm

420 wrote:
Uncle Fester wrote:No I'm not, but I'm willing to learn.

I'll be out of job at the end of the year.
I'm looking for an apprentice.

Do you like to drink a bunch, and pretend to work?

If you feel you can fill the above qualifications... you may be our guy in the Minnesota division.

IN. We could do a T1B interview. I've got Goobs down as one of my references.

And Tom, check this out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-caPGOSBINU

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Wed Dec 13, 2006 10:40 pm

And as far as the dumass Texans/NYer -- they're fucked, unless they're found in the next couple of hours...and since dude's ice cave was thought to be at 11,000 feet, and rescuers didn't figure they'd get above about 7-8000 today...

Sorry.

But there's allegedly a really nastyass storm coming, which will make the weather of the last few days seem like child's play on the hill. If we're supposed to get up to 70MPH winds here in the lowlands, and a big mess of rain, it's not a good time to be outdoors on the mountain, even in civilization.

And since you guys brought it up...there's a bitching microbrewery right on Mt Hood...Mt Hood Brewing, as a matter of fact. I might even be sporting some of their gear as I type. Add 4500 feet of elevation to some 8.0% ABV suds...yeah, buddy. Got way liquored up at that place a couple of months ago...and naturally went home with the only single chicks in Government Camp that day.

100+MPH winds coming to the coast tonight-btw. That'll be the third time so far this season. Where's all of our free shit, FEMA? Buncha pussies Down South.

YD · Post by YD » Wed Dec 13, 2006 10:44 pm

my bbq blew off my porch and down a big rock wall this week, the wind was howlin so bad.

I liked that bbq. I'll miss it. Its toast

jtr · Post by **jtr** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 3:33 am

Mikey wrote:What about some good local microbrew?

Say mikey you're a physics kind of guy who I could ask a random question to and not get totally smacked right?

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 4:20 am

jtr wrote:
Mikey wrote:What about some good local microbrew?
Say mikey you're a physics kind of guy who I could ask a random question to and not get totally smacked right?

That depends on the question.

jtr · Post by **jtr** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 8:55 am

mine has to do with light years and the speed of light.

Ingse Bodil · Post by **Ingse Bodil** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:15 pm

jtr wrote:mine has to do with light years and the speed of light.

that reminds me... on some elegant universe type show they were doing black holes, and now they say that black holes don't just suck everything in that crosses the event horizon with no hope of return, they had pictures of black holes geysering intense amounts of energy (? matter? or something). I knew what goes in had to find a way to come out, but that was incredible the picture (theory?) drawn.

The pull of a black hole is incredibly immense; but how much more intense must the spew of a black hole be, to counter it's own pull? what happens to all of that regurgitated matter? and (this is where it dovetails with jess' pre-question) if the black hole captures all light, does the spew of the black hole contain the secret to travel beyond the speed of light?

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:20 pm

Ingse Bodil wrote:but how much more intense must the spew of a black hole be

Softball, anyone?

Derron · Post by **Derron** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 3:07 pm

Dinsdale wrote:.and naturally went home with the only single chicks in Government Camp that day.

And what a fine bunch of good looking St. Bernard rescue dogs they were, and so frisky.....

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Thu Dec 14, 2006 3:09 pm

Smackie Chan wrote:
Ingse Bodil wrote:but how much more intense must the spew of a black hole be
Softball, anyone?

It's like whacking a 300lb marshmallow.

T1B

U&L Survival Essentials

U&L Survival Essentials

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yo dog

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