Poolpissers

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Mal
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Poolpissers

Post by Mal »

So I'm at some fuckin party for someone in somebodys family that I apparently know from somewhere.

Cheap fucking scumbags that they are they held the party at some fucking pool at some private complex somewhere.

I hate that shit.

Few things in life are more discusting to me than a public pool filled with discusting people I don't know.

But as any socal will tell you over the last several days it has been chestnuts roasting over a motherfucking open fire and shit around here.

So in we went,because it goes without saying that nothing cools down the body more than a nice dip in the warm urine of about 50 different people. :roll:

Since I was in I couldn't help but take in the atmosphere. A public pool is a strange place in many ways....

I couldn't help but notice a lot of fat asses throwing beers like that shit was gonna run out or something. I'm not distinguishing between men or women mind you. Truly fatness was an epidemic of equal opportunity on this day.

On a completely related note. Fat bitches feel free to switch from a two piece bikini for fucks sakes. No need to share your misery with the rest of the world. Witnessing fat rolls flapping in the afternoon breeze is not a pleasant sight.

Now I don't know about you but I may be able to throw two, maybe three beers before I am feeling the urge to piss.

Not so with these fuckheads. One particular fat ass was at least 5 beers in with no sign of heading to the bathroom in sight.

:roll: Yeah right.

I can only imagine the amount of piss that fat bloated bovine had contributed into the very "water" I was soaking in.

Motherfucking discusting bloated obese porkrind loving fatties....

So what is that shit anyway? Is it pure laziness? That fucking bathroom all of twelve feet away just too much for you to deal with?

Or is it embarassment at exposing your Pam Anderson sized funbags to the rest of the crowd as you endure your long walk of shame sans your bro ya fat orblike bigtittied fuck?

Or did he just not give a fuck? Maybe fatboy was raised by fucking wolves or something and just pissed wherever the fuck he pleased.

Whatever the reason it was fucking vile beyond comprehension.

An hour later fatboy still showed no signs of heading for the pisser.

I can only assume that he had emptied about 8 beers worth of piss into the pool at that point, thankfully I was long outta the water by then.

Drove home fast as fuck and scrubbed the fuck outta myself with a fucking Brillo pad.

Unrack public pools.
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MgoBlue-LightSpecial
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

Did you post this here to avoid hurting Spray's feelings?

Also, if you have such an enormous disdain for public swimming pools, then why the fuck did you go in?

In that situation, you clearly need to be "that guy" that just stands around, sipping his beer, cracking jokes about everyone, and waiting until it's time to leave.
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Adelpiero
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Post by Adelpiero »

i wizz in peoples pools, fuck them.


ps telling people that the chemical you put in the pool will turn peoples pants purple if they urinate is bullshit. and i pissed 3 times just to say,"fuck you"


i feel a good beer wizz coming, might have to hit the neighbors pool.
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Post by Wolfman »

timely topic--
my older daughter is visiting with my two Grandsons
--first order of business is to show them the pool bath !!
now swimming in the Gulf on Sanibel is a different
story !!
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Post by smackaholic »

uhhh, mgo. How could you let that horrific repeated misspelling go without slapping a fine or at least a written warning on the honkey?

I'm disGusted with the sloppy writing around this place and the even more sloppy enforcement of such.
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Post by Bobby42 »

Chlorine was made for a reason.
MgoBlue-LightSpecial
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Post by MgoBlue-LightSpecial »

smackaholic wrote:uhhh, mgo. How could you let that horrific repeated misspelling go without slapping a fine or at least a written warning on the honkey?

I'm disGusted with the sloppy writing around this place and the even more sloppy enforcement of such.
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Mikey
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Post by Mikey »

So, you were watching this fat fucking pig drink beers for what, 2 or 3 hours to see if he was going to piss?

RACK you. You must be the life of the fucking party.


BTW, RACK my 100% private pool. Nobody pees in there but me.
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Jack
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Post by Jack »

and if this girl pisses in a pool what are you going to do?

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Post by poptart »

Honky, after the water buffalo in question had downed beer #3 or 4 and still not removed himself from the drink I might have chosen to approach him and ask him when he was planning on stepping out to take a piss.

If he brushed me off, joked it off, or otherwise mocked me I might proceed to double-hand him on the top of the head and hold him under water until he wised up.

Sometimes an 'attention-getter' is all it takes.
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Mal
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Post by Mal »

:lol:
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Post by Mister Bushice »

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Post by Some Damn Retard »

Jack wrote:and if this girl pisses in a pool what are you going to do?

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shots :oops:
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Post by socal »

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Van wrote:Kumbaya, asshats.
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Atomic Punk wrote:So why did you post it?
Yes, that just happened.
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Terry in Crapchester
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Re: Poolpissers

Post by Terry in Crapchester »

TLRH wrote:Pam Anderson sized funbags
In.

And you know that Van would have posted that if I hadn't. Just sayin'. :wink:
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Re: Poolpissers

Post by Cuda »

TLRH wrote: scrubbed the fuck outta myself with a fucking Brillo pad.

.

You should invest in a cheese grater
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Adelpiero
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Post by Adelpiero »

memo to pool owners with a,"no peeing in the pool" sign:


Instead of taking 1 long wizzz, i lke to spread it out to 4-5 good wizzes. fuck you
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Post by Mike Backer »

Fuck pissing. I shot a generous load of my man magma in the country club pool when I was 16. No bullshit.
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Re: Poolpissers

Post by Smackie Chan »

mvscal wrote:Yet there you were...soaking in it.
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Post by YD »

I fukken hate public pools. The fukken piss hippos and water buffalo, coupled with the fukken bratty shit kids tend to keep me away. The golf club we belong to has a deece pool thats usually empty except weekends.No fatt asses at all. a lot of fake cans. But there are piss kids that never get out and you know what that means. Fukken parents fault. My OL makes the kids get out and go periodicly. Anyway even that is bad enough, but when its 100 in the high desert, I'm in for a whizzy swim.

Saturday of this last weekend I was at the pool with the kids, and the club hired a dj for the summer "pool party bbq"

dude gets up there tells his shitty jokes, starts playing teh ghey, asking for requests.

nobody was giving him any so he kept spinning gheyer songs. actually they were really faggy songs. I was in the middle of the pool playing launch the 6yr old when he put on another faggy 50's joint. I hucked the kid and did a mark spitz to the side of the pool and yarded my self out of the water.

I walked up to the dude soaking wet and told the dude that Huey's Power of Love would set this party off. he kinda staggered back surprised at the pissed off look on my face coupled with the huey request,but he went digging through his cd's anyway.

by the time I had walked over to my poolside table and gotten halfway into my turkey sammich and keers light, the air was filled with the sounds of marty mcfly doin 88 mph in a stainless sled.

As I had planned it, monkey see monkey do with the 80's requests. Its like blended drinks at a bar. Once some tard chick sees somebody else get a daq, its a chain reaction. My 80's pool party was epicly rackable.
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Post by socal »

timmay wrote:...starts playing teh ghey
That a fact?
so I walked up to the dude soaking wet and told the dude that Huey's Power of Love would set this party off.
:lol:
Van wrote:Kumbaya, asshats.
R-Jack wrote:
Atomic Punk wrote:So why did you post it?
Yes, that just happened.
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