Want to hurt a lot? Do this.

Roger_the_Shrubber · Post by **Roger_the_Shrubber** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 4:46 am

Fucking 3 broken ribs. Fell carrying wood for the fire place into the house. Onto set in the ground brick patio.

Holy rolling sheep shit!!!!!!!! Does this hurt, but ya know, only when I breath, or move, or try to lay on my back, or try to lift my arm above my waist.

What sucks worse is the only thing to do is wrap them, so it makes it even HARDER to breath!

I've heard a collar bone break or pelvis break is the worst, but damn, I'd put this shit near the top.

Pile on, if you wish. But a question....most painful injury you have ever had.

Damn..this hurts. And no, I don't take pain pills so lose that one.

trev · Post by **trev** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 5:25 am

You break 2 ribs falling? Your hip is next.

And, why not take some pain pills for it?

poptart · Post by **poptart** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 5:39 am

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 5:45 am

I broke a few bones in my foot when I was playing football. Hurt like hell for two months. Got to spend a bunch of time with a sexy rehab lady.

Sorry to hear about the ribs Shrubber.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 6:04 am

Roger_the_Shrubber wrote: What sucks worse is

.....reading your shit posts about your shit body making your shit life even shittier.

Spare us the charade on being drug free you crippled freak. Remember, the big guy knows you are sleeping. It's not hard. You're always so doped up you could throw a dart at a clock and we'll likely find you snoozing at that time. One year you hit the somas pretty hard and Boss decided to have some fun. He dragged your comatose carcass up the chimney, attached your lifeless legs up to our harness and air surfed for an hour before we dumped you back in your bed. God Damn that was fun.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Tue Dec 01, 2015 10:04 am

Roger_the_Shrubber wrote:Fucking 3 broken ribs. Fell carrying wood for the fire place into the house. Onto set in the ground brick patio.

Uh-huh. Sure.

mvscal wrote:
Shlomart Ben Yisrael wrote:percocet.
Oh, Jesus Shitballs!! Save some for me, fellas. I'm on my way!!

The Seer · Post by **The Seer** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 10:08 am

Roger_the_Shrubber wrote: Does this hurt, but ya know, only when I breath, or move, or try to lay on my back, or try to lift my arm above my waist.

Since you've elected to not utilize meds that can alleviate some of your discomfort, the answer is very simple. Just don't -

" breath, or move, or try to lay on my back, or try to lift my arm above my waist."

You're welcome.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 12:09 pm

Worst pain for me was after doing my stupid ladder trick a few years back. After riding the ladder to the bottom of the deck, crashing through the railing and doing what to the best of my recollection a back flip or three, I landed flat on my back.

Other than getting every last cc of wind knocked out of me, it actually didn't hurt that much. This is called being in shock. I actually drove myself to the ER in this state. Fortunately it is only 3 miles away, because about 3 minutes after walking in the door, the whole shock thing sorta fizzled out.

Being in shock kinda sucks a little, but you know what sucks worse?

Coming out of shock.

Somehow, I managed to not break anything, but my entire back was nicely tenderized. Those next few hours as I laid there begging for pain meds were well below average. Wouldn't wish it on anyone other than maybe felcho.

Fortunately the spaghetti monster or firmament keeper or buddha or whichever fukking deity it was that had duty that day, was looking out for me. No long lasting effects other than a bit of stiffness now and then and any chances of me every becoming a Sherpa are pretty much out. I find that a backpack with anything more than 30 pounds in it for extended periods kinda sucks.

And yes, your're g0d dam right I took advantage of any and all pharmacological products I could get hold of.

Wolfman · Post by **Wolfman** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 12:52 pm

I never broke any bones but had bruised ribs once and that was painful enough. Hope you can heal quickly.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 2:03 pm

I've cracked a rib before. Pain is fairly constant but not that severe. Rub some dirt on it, you fucking pussy.

First few days after a knee replacement stings a lot.

Earache on an airplane is pretty nasty.

The Seer · Post by **The Seer** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 2:39 pm

Goober McTuber wrote: Earache on an airplane is pretty nasty.

Try aerosinusitis or baro-trauma. Simply find a rusty icepick and shove it into your forehead above the eyebrow. I've heard it's retired a few pilots. Some women have claimed it is worse than child birth.

Always on the descent. Lucky me.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 3:56 pm

In a car accident in 1978 I fractured two vertebrae (around T3 and T4 I think) and lost about half my right calf muscle. Actually lucky I didn't bleed out.

The most painful part was then they took about a 4" x 10" hunk of skin off the front of my left thigh to graft over the right calf. Not a pleasant experience.

mvscal · Post by **mvscal** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 4:26 pm

Jsc810 wrote:
Roger_the_Shrubber wrote:But a question....most painful injury you have ever had.

Damn..this hurts. And no, I don't take pain pills so lose that one.

You hurt, but don't take pain meds? Did you have brain trauma as well? Dude, take the damn pills, wtf is wrong with you?

I'm pretty sure he's one those 7th Day Adventist dummies.

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 5:20 pm

Goober McTuber wrote: Earache on an airplane is pretty nasty.

Simple work around that is almost 100%. First off make nice with the waitresses cause this is easier to have their help than bringing all your own supplies. Ask her for two of the plastic cups, two hot towels from first class and two cocktail napkins.

Once delivered, tip the waitress as you might need her help later on depending on the severity of your problem and the length of climb or descent. Now put one moist hot towel in the bottom of each cup. Then put one cup over each of your ears. Makes sure to stuff all of the ear cartilage inside the cup so that you have a pretty good seal. Now hold the cups there until you reach cruise altitude. Do the same on descent.

The warm moist air helps your ear drum slowly equalize the air pressure in the ear and the cabin.

Yes people will laff, but it will keep your ears from hurting.

trev · Post by **trev** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 5:43 pm

Waitress?

Rooster · Post by **Rooster** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 6:10 pm

I think he meant sky waitress.

trev · Post by **trev** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 6:23 pm

I thought they were flight attendants and there for our safety.

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 7:33 pm

trev wrote:I thought they were flight attendants and there for our safety.

When have you ever seen them do something for your safety? I can point to a few safety fails by them as well.

Everyone remembers Capt Sully putting the Airbus down in the Hudson. Turns out one of the rear doors was opened. This should not have happened. Had the waitresses been doing their job they would have prevented such. There is a reason they are seated in the rear galley.

Or more recently in Vegas where the engine caught fire and the takeoff was aborted. The doors on the side of the plane where the fire was should not have been opened. Yet they were. This helped draw more smoke into the cabin. Again the waitresses are seated where they are for a reason.

In an emergency you had better plan to take care of yourself and help those around you if you can because the waitresses can't be counted on to stick to their training. There is also a reason the get far more training in plating a meal and the proper pouring of wine and bubbly than they do evacuation.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 8:02 pm

Left Seater wrote:
trev wrote:I thought they were flight attendants and there for our safety.
When have you ever seen them do something for your safety?

So, you've actually been trolling us all these years, and have never set foot on a commercial airline?

RACK you, my friend. Well played.

Except with one post, your roost (sup Shoalzie) comes crumbling down...

Since in every pre-takeoff speech I've ever heard, they tell you the flight attendants are there "for your safety." Pretty freaking sure that's what Trev was referring to.

BSmack · Post by **BSmack** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 8:07 pm

Gall Bladder attacks are the suck. I've heard Kidney Stones blow choad too.

Dinsdale · Post by **Dinsdale** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 8:15 pm

15+ years ago, I collapsed the lower portion of my ribcage. Quite fucking painful. Still have a big dent there.

But that wasn't nearly as painful as the dislocated SI joint (where the pelvis attaches to the spine) a couple of years ago. That was the suck of all suck.

Roger_the_Shrubber · Post by **Roger_the_Shrubber** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 8:36 pm

JSC,

I don't take pain pills because I don't like them. So much for the "theories". It would just lessen it a little. Just taking ibuprofen.

And the reindeer queefs, you were never funny.

Smackie Chan · Post by **Smackie Chan** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 8:36 pm

I've read a few LTS TRD2 posts without being self-medicated. The pain ranks right up there broken ribs, I'm sure.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 9:25 pm

Roger_the_Shrubber wrote: And the reindeer queefs, you were never funny.

I'll go with that. A reindeer queef is far stronger and smellier than a human one. Sometimes they attract bears.

Of course that could just be Vixen's rancid snatch.

The Seer · Post by **The Seer** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 10:41 pm

Smackie Chan wrote:I've read a few LTS TRD2 posts without being self-medicated. The pain ranks right up there broken ribs, I'm sure.

Yes, there is that.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Dec 01, 2015 11:45 pm

Ibuprofen is an anti-inflammatory, not a pain pill per se. It will probably help if your pain is coming from an inflammation.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 12:03 am

Goober McTuber wrote:Ibuprofen is an anti-inflammatory, not a pain pill per se. It will probably help if your pain is coming from an inflammation.

Using medication properly isn't how Rodger *ahem* rolls.

Blitzen · Post by **Blitzen** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 1:18 am

Cupid wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:Ibuprofen is an anti-inflammatory, not a pain pill per se. It will probably help if your pain is coming from an inflammation.
Using medication properly isn't how Rodger *ahem* rolls.

Yup. Roger has been relying on pain medication for awhile now.

However, latest news is he is off the meds and is clear headed.

Still, his mother was a hamster and his father smelled of elderberries.

DNA evidence suggests something far, far worse.

Stay tuned.

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 2:47 am

Left Seater wrote:When have you ever seen them do something for your safety? I can point to a few safety fails by them as well.

Everyone remembers Capt Sully putting the Airbus down in the Hudson. Turns out one of the rear doors was opened. This should not have happened. Had the waitresses been doing their job they would have prevented such. There is a reason they are seated in the rear galley.

Or more recently in Vegas where the engine caught fire and the takeoff was aborted. The doors on the side of the plane where the fire was should not have been opened. Yet they were. This helped draw more smoke into the cabin. Again the waitresses are seated where they are for a reason.

In an emergency you had better plan to take care of yourself and help those around you if you can because the waitresses can't be counted on to stick to their training. There is also a reason the get far more training in plating a meal and the proper pouring of wine and bubbly than they do evacuation.

Sounds like Heft Seater's been shot down a time or several by one of these "waitresses." Shit, I'm a different species and even I managed to get my dong suckled in the bathroom at LAX the year the fat man's sleigh broke down and we had to hop the first red eye out of town.

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 3:41 am

Dasher wrote:Shit, I'm a different species and even I managed to get my dong suckled in the bathroom at LAX the year the fat man's sleigh broke down and we had to hop the first red eye out of town.

Bathroom blowjobs at an airport. Who knew reindeer were gay.

Huh.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 4:17 am

Hey doubleSeater, is there a reason when you hear "airport blowjob" you automatically assume "men's room"?

Care to share? Actually don't. Just be happy your McMansion has a closet big enough for you to fit

Roger_the_Shrubber · Post by **Roger_the_Shrubber** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 5:45 am

Cupid wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:Ibuprofen is an anti-inflammatory, not a pain pill per se. It will probably help if your pain is coming from an inflammation.
Using medication properly isn't how Rodger *ahem* rolls.

And you would know this how?

Shit head.

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 8:14 am

Cupid wrote:Hey doubleSeater, is there a reason when you hear "airport blowjob" you automatically assume "men's room"?

Given the fact there was a story on the news here in CO about police busting gays having sex in public restrooms, yeah there is a reason.

Cupid wrote: Just be happy your McMansion has a closet big enough for you to fit

Update your spreadsheet you tick ridden fleabag.

Diego in Seattle · Post by **Diego in Seattle** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 1:21 pm

Left Seater wrote:
Cupid wrote:Hey doubleSeater, is there a reason when you hear "airport blowjob" you automatically assume "men's room"?

Given the fact there was a story on the news here in CO about police busting gays having sex in public restrooms, yeah there is a reason.

So given the fact that there's been a whole bunch on the CO news about what happened at the Planned Parenthood clinic you now believe that the "Right To Life" people are terrorists?

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 2:11 pm

Nice stretch.

Dasher · Post by **Dasher** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 2:49 pm

Left Seater wrote:Given the fact there was a story on the news here in CO about police busting gays having sex in public restrooms, yeah there is a reason.

So, you read about some faggots in CO, therefore all bathroom sex is gay sex. That's some brilliant deductive reasoning there, Cock Beater. Says a lot about where your head is at.

But let's get back to why you hate flight attendants so much. Or rather, why they don't like you. My guess? Pretty simple. Chicks dig dudes who have at least one of the following:

#1 Money
#2 Funny

You don't make enough #1 to compensate for your complete lack of #2.

Speaking of #2, expect a few extra logs on your fireplace from Yours Truly this year, if you know what I mean.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 3:44 pm

Dasher wrote:
Speaking of #2, expect a few extra logs on your fireplace from Yours Truly this year, if you know what I mean.

He's probably going to pick up our berry sized droppings and save them for Halloween to give to the colored kids.

Cupid · Post by **Cupid** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 3:48 pm

Roger_the_Shrubber wrote:
Cupid wrote:
Goober McTuber wrote:Ibuprofen is an anti-inflammatory, not a pain pill per se. It will probably help if your pain is coming from an inflammation.
Using medication properly isn't how Rodger *ahem* rolls.
And you would know this how?

Shit head.

What is it about opiate abusers that makes them so sensitive?

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 4:52 pm

Left Seater · Post by **Left Seater** » Wed Dec 02, 2015 5:15 pm

Dinsdale wrote: So, you've actually been trolling us all these years, and have never set foot on a commercial airline?

RACK you, my friend. Well played.

Except with one post, your roost (sup Shoalzie) comes crumbling down...

Since in every pre-takeoff speech I've ever heard, they tell you the flight attendants are there "for your safety." Pretty freaking sure that's what Trev was referring to.

If you have to watch and listen to know how to buckle your seat belt, or where a door is, or even how to put on a life jacket you should not be flying without a babysitter.

The truth is you better be extremely nice to them or they will kick you off the plane for even looking at them incorrectly. If they are having a bad day watch out, you might suddenly be traveling on a later flight.

Recent examples include someone who didn't hold the door for a waitress in the terminal, someone who didn't hear the waitress when she was loading the plane. Plenty more out there as well.