Why don't we talk about good health for a change?

[R-Jack]

Like mine for example. I just figure with you folks reading stories as depressing as Wags angry pancreas or Screw's collapsed asshole leading to his death, it would be nice little pick me up to read about people in perfect health.

I participate in these biometric screenings at work to get a discount on my health insurance. All you have to do to qualify for the savings is total cholesterol under 240 and a blood pressure of 140/90. In simple terms, as long as you are not a walking stroke risk with clogged arteries, you’re eligible. With the bloodwork they do, they include a list of other results for you to forward to your doctor and develop strategies to fix.

Got my results. Let's just say I don't need to call my doctor to work towards improvement.

Total cholesterol. Expected range 125-200. Mine : 149
HDL cholesterol (the good one). Expected: over 40mg/dl. Mine: 66
Triglycerides. Expected: under 150mg/dl. Mine : 33
LDL cholesterol (the bad one). Expected: under 130mg/dl. Mine : 76
Cholesterol/HDL ratio: Expeced: 5 or under. Mine : 2.3
Glucose: Too low:65. Too high:99. Mine: 84
BMI: 24.0
Blood Pressure: normal goal 120/80. Mine: 118/60

Needless to say that last weeks bloodwork was the best test I ever took in my life. Now I know this isn't the definitive statement of total body health. I have minor things like a creaky knee after back to back three hour games of basketball and I doubt that it's normal for one testicle to itch so much more than the other two. However I was very happy with reading these results yesterday. It goes without saying that I celebrated with a six pack of Pyramid.

Get used to it. This shithole is going to have me for a long, long, time.

[R-Jack]

Rack your good health Sam.

I know how you feel about being in pain. On Monday I ran two miles on the treadmill, did 30 minutes of plyometrics, got my leg press up to 400 lbs. and finished off with running another mile.

I was a little sore.

[Mikey]

RACK everybody's good health. Appreciate it while it lasts.

My BP was 140/81 last check. Not great but it's been worse.

Can't remember all my blood work but total cholesterol was 190 - HDL and LDL were good, triglycerides were a little high. This is a big improvement over what it was when I first had it checked about 30 years ago. My total cholesterol was over 400. It's an inherited condition where the triglycerides are through the roof. Controlled with Lipitor, exercise and lots of internet usage.

So, other than the fact that I have two new bionic hips (strength and ROM are like 20 years ago, BTW) and the fact that my right arm is starting to go numb, I'm doing OK. Getting old sucks, though.

[Go Coogs']

I have to get a full blown physical every year.

I don't have my paperwork either but all my numbers were within range. I also have 20/15 vision.

I could stand to lose a couple pounds in the belly area, but other than that, its good to see I'm living right.

Rack all of you.

[Goober McTuber]

I get a physical every year, last one was in February. My numbers are all well within the acceptable ranges. Several years ago my cholesterol was climbing so I made changes to my diet (including Crestor) and everything came back down.

I don’t have the numbers in front of me either, but my HDL cholesterol consistently shows up in the 80s, undoubtedly due to my red wine consumption.

[Dinsdale]

I used ot make fun of people with carpal tunnel probs. What a pussy problem. But man, is it a bitch when it happens.

My health is outstanding, except the carpal tunnelS. And the whatchamajigit other nerve that goes through the wrist. Both wrists. When that shit fires off, my middle and forefinger clamp tight to my palm, and it's excruciating, and renders the hand useless. Sometimes, the other one goes, and it's the forefinger and pinky -- hurts slightly less.

Yeah, laugh away -- that shit is unbelievably painful.

[Wolfman]

Guess you youngsters don't have any concern for your PSA.

[Goober McTuber]

Guess you youngsters don't have any concern for your PSA.

Guess you old-timers don't keep up with current events. Do a google search on "psa test no longer recommended" and see what you find.

[Goober McTuber]

Guess you youngsters don't have any concern for your PSA.

They did a biopsy on the ol' prostate end of last year. 12 snips off that bastard.

Lucky you.

8.Why is the PSA test controversial in screening?

Using the PSA test to screen men for prostate cancer is controversial because it is not yet known for certain whether this test actually saves lives. Moreover, it is not clear that the benefits of PSA screening outweigh the risks of follow-up diagnostic tests and cancer treatments. For example, the PSA test may detect small cancers that would never become life threatening. This situation, called overdiagnosis, puts men at risk of complications from unnecessary treatment.

The procedure used to diagnose prostate cancer (prostate biopsy) may cause harmful side effects, including bleeding and infection. Prostate cancer treatments, such as surgery and radiation therapy, may cause incontinence (inability to control urine flow), erectile dysfunction (erections inadequate for intercourse), and other complications. For these reasons, it is important that the benefits and risks of diagnostic procedures and treatment be taken into account when considering whether to undertake prostate cancer screening.

[BSmack]

I doubt that it's normal for one testicle to itch so much more than the other two.

[Mikey]

So what's up with your arm, Mikey?

Cervical radiculopathy (C5 and C6).

It comes with a long story, maybe I'll post it later.
Or maybe not.

(cueing Marty in 3...2...1...)

[jiminphilly]

Running my first 5k of the year (and frankly ever) on Saturday. Been running well the past few weeks (including Lady Bird trail in Austin while I was traveling there for business) and got my average mile pace down to about 7:40, though I did a 6:40 mile on Monday when I ran 3.2 miles. Today I went out much slower and had a 7:50 pace for about 2.5 miles. Saturday should be fun.

Rack the Nike GPS app.

[Left Seater]

(including Lady Bird trail in Austin while I was traveling there for business)

There might not be a better place to run, what with all the scenery.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Geddy Lee is a lot shorter than I thought.

[Van]

And Jsc looks like Michael Phelps compared to those (typical) fat fucks sitting behind him.

Jsc, perhaps those two could stand to put a little less South in their mouths.

[jiminphilly]

(including Lady Bird trail in Austin while I was traveling there for business)

all the scenery.

rack.
Austin has some of the best looking women.

Oh were you talking about the lake?

[Left Seater]

Oh were you talking about the lake?

Hell, NO!

[Wolfman]

Did the whole prostate routine last year: tactile exam, sonogram/CAT scan or whatever it was, biopsy (wasn't that fun Sam ?) to find two small tumors. Urologist said I'll die of something else first. That was good enough for me. See ya ! I'm going to be 73 in May and I'm not signing on to a bunch of treatments and meds for that. Would it help me to drop about 50 pounds--hell yes, but I'm not sweating that----yet.

[jiminphilly]

Would it help me to drop about 50 pounds--hell yes, but I'm not sweating that----yet.

I imagine carrying around an extra 50 lbs is causing you to sweat excessively anyway.

[Python]

A couple of years ago I said I was in the best shape of my life, then it all started going downhill fast. In order:

Torn cartilage in my elbow.
Strained bicep.
Strained muscle in my chest/ribs.
Degenerative torn meniscus in left knee. Supartz injection allowed me to keep running.
Degenerative torn meniscus in right knee. Just finished second Supartz injection.
Some kind of strain in my neck for the last month, making it impossible to turn my head to the right.
Add all of that to my high cholesterol and high BP, along with an under producing (I think. I forget.) thyroid and off and on anemia.

It seems like even the slightest injury now takes a month to heal without exception. Just as soon as I get back into my routine of running and lifting, something happens and I have to stop for weeks at a time. Right now I have all of two body parts I can workout. OK, make that 3 but mini-me doesn't really count.

For some reason I had it in my mind that it would be ok for my body to start breaking down at 50 years old, but no sooner than that. This crap started happening at 44. If the knee injections ever stop working, I pretty much won't be able to walk. I get pissed looking at all the fatties in my office that don't give a crap about anything, but I have to literally workout through pain just to try and stay healthy. It just ain't fair. I hate this crap. Even so, I'm still fit and trim, but my body hurts like heck.

Oh, and it's been almost five years since I had a cigarette or a drink. I gave them both up on the same day. I don't recommend that to anyone.

Call me Chip jr.

[The Seer]

Nobody gets out alive.

[Python]

The elbow was caused by poor form. No question about it. The others were probably because of too much weight, but one time I pulled something from doing freaking pull ups, for cryin' out loud. The same things I've been doing forever suddenly seem to cause injuries. Guess I need to just back off from everything a little. No more lifting to failure. High reps doesn't help build muscle but I guess I should count myself lucky I don't have any serious health issues. You know, death type stuff.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

I fucked up a shoulder when i was 42 trying to do the same routine I did in my 30s. It's a reality we all have to face.

The Hell you say. I am 43... and I

a.)work out harder
b.)am much stronger

...than 10-15 years ago. It's harder for me to keep my body fat low. That I will grant you. Way harder. :brad:

[Van]

Fuck all you people. Seriously.

[Python]

Weight isn't an isue with me. I'm really thin, thanks to good genes and a lot of running as I've gotten older. I guess the knees wearing out so early is just genetic, like my cholesterol and BP. My entire skinny family has it, much like my good looks.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Scott -- I first joined a gym when I was 20 and I trained hardcore for the first 5-7 years. I took in 200+ grams of protein/day <--- insert you favorite homosmack here.

Now I eat pretty much what my family is eating. I think it has a lot to do with less drinking, drugs, partying. As in, I don't do any of those things anymore, except for an occasional beer. Maybe once/twice a month.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

...a gym...

...muscle...

Oh great. Here we go again...

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Don't pull me into that vortex, Scott.

Just...don't.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

All is well, Scott.

Best wishes to you and your family, my dear friend.

Take care.

[Cuda]

A couple of years ago I said I was in the best shape of my life, then it all started going downhill fast. In order:

Torn cartilage in my elbow.
Strained bicep.
Strained muscle in my chest/ribs.
Degenerative torn meniscus in left knee. Supartz injection allowed me to keep running.
Degenerative torn meniscus in right knee. Just finished second Supartz injection.
Some kind of strain in my neck for the last month, making it impossible to turn my head to the right.
Add all of that to my high cholesterol and high BP, along with an under producing (I think. I forget.) thyroid and off and on anemia.

It seems like even the slightest injury now takes a month to heal without exception. Just as soon as I get back into my routine of running and lifting, something happens and I have to stop for weeks at a time. Right now I have all of two body parts I can workout. OK, make that 3 but mini-me doesn't really count.

For some reason I had it in my mind that it would be ok for my body to start breaking down at 50 years old, but no sooner than that. This crap started happening at 44. If the knee injections ever stop working, I pretty much won't be able to walk. I get pissed looking at all the fatties in my office that don't give a crap about anything, but I have to literally workout through pain just to try and stay healthy. It just ain't fair. I hate this crap. Even so, I'm still fit and trim, but my body hurts like heck.

Oh, and it's been almost five years since I had a cigarette or a drink. I gave them both up on the same day. I don't recommend that to anyone.

Call me Chip jr.

Good thing you don't have any wasp nests to deal with.

[socal]

Finished LA Marathon in 4:10 this year. Last year did it in 3:34. Old, fat, slow, and pissed.

[Goober McTuber]

The Wife weighed 125 when we got married and she's still 125 - size 5

Is your wife Japanese? US doesn't have a size 5.

[Python]

Cuda, you ever try to spray a wasp nest and run for your life with 2 bad knees? Down goes Frazier.

[Mikey]

Cuda, you ever try to spray a wasp nest and run for your life with 2 bad knees? Down goes Frazier.

When I was 17 or so, working on a golf course, I found a bottle of insect repellant. Poured it down a yellowjacket nest in the ground and drove off as fast as I could in a golf cart.

Knees didn't come into play.

Those were good times, yo.

[Python]

You asked your wife what her dress size was? I couldn't run away fast enough, even with good knees.

[Goober McTuber]

US doesn't have a size 5.

I just went to the source and she said you're wrong - It's a Juniors size and depending on who makes the garment she either wears a 5 or a 6

Well, yes, there is a US size 5. In children’s junior misses. You fucking pedophile.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clothing_sizes

[Dinsdale]

I'm guessing they don't sell any single-digits whatsoever in Wisconsin.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

Can we get an expert (like AP) in here to get a ruling on women's sizes?

[Goober McTuber]

I go WI on business.

Based on the size of the average Wisconsin women I've seen, I understand why he would think size 5 is a kids size

Nice try. Check this out:

http://chartsbin.com/view/562

Fattest States Ranking - 2011
Missouri 11
Kansas 15
Wisconsin 25

How tall is your wife Scott? My wife is 5'7", under 120 lbs and wears a size 6.

[Goober McTuber]

I'm not saying we don't have fat ass in Missouri - we do

But You're the one claiming to be a wiki expert on womens sizes

I've just bought clothes for my wife before. I've always seen the sizes on the rack 2, 4, 6, 8, etc. Never any odd numbers.