T1B

Roach wrote:A little girl walks in on her naked Dad, while he is shaving.

"Wow Dad, what's that!?!" she says staring at his unit.

"Oh that's my penis little darling..."

"Oooooh when do I get one?"

"In about 20 minutes when your mom goes to the store.

Has anyone laughed at this 'joke'... ever? :?

I'm waiting for a thread titled..."Joke-a funny one"

A young Jewish girl runs up to her mom & says, “Mom, I know where babies come from." Mom says “Really, tell me.” The girl says, “The mom & dad get naked, then Daddy puts his thing in Mommy’s mouth & he explodes & that’s where babies come from.” Mom replies, “Oh honey, that’s not where babies come from. That’s where jewelry comes from.”

Lady in a jewelry store sees a ring & as she bends over to look at it, she farts. Embarrassed, she looks around to see if anyone noticed & a salesman is standing nearby. He greets her with, "Good day, Madam. How may we help you today?” Hoping he missed her little 'incident', she asks, "What’s the price of this ring?" He replies, “Madam, if you farted just looking at it, you're gonna shit when I tell you the price."

Why does your avatar remind me of this?

Wolfman wrote:Why does your avatar remind me of this?

I dunno, but I'm sure the punch line will be a real knee slapper.

Smackie Chan wrote:

Wolfman wrote:Why does your avatar remind me of this?

I dunno, but I'm sure the punch line will be a real knee slapper.

That will be a first in here

Roach wrote:Little boy walks in on his naked mother and sees her private frontal nudity.

"Gee Mom, what's that?!?"

His Mom explains "That's where God hit me with his hatchet"

"Wow, right in the cunt. Did it hurt?"

I think I heard Gilbert Gottfried tell that joke...it sounds funnier coming from him.

Smackie Chan wrote:Lady in a jewelry store sees a ring & as she bends over to look at it, she farts. Embarrassed, she looks around to see if anyone noticed & a salesman is standing nearby. He greets her with, "Good day, Madam. How may we help you today?” Hoping he missed her little 'incident', she asks, "What’s the price of this ring?" He replies, “Madam, if you farted just looking at it, you're gonna shit when I tell you the price."

I snickered.

[sung with an Elvis Costello voice]
RUBBER SHE SAID
AND RUB HER I DID
I DONT WORK THERE ANYMORE!!!

Newlyweds are in bed when the groom turns to his bride and says, "Honey, whenever you want to have sex, just reach over, grab my penis & pull on it once or twice. She says, "But what if I don't want to have sex." He replies. "Then pull on it 80 or 90 times."

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:

Roach wrote:A little girl walks in on her naked Dad, while he is shaving.

"Wow Dad, what's that!?!" she says staring at his unit.

"Oh that's my penis little darling..."

"Oooooh when do I get one?"

"In about 20 minutes when your mom goes to the store.

Has anyone laughed at this 'joke'... ever? :?

"Lighten up. It's hilarious!"

Sincerely,



MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!




...and a swift indictment to others.

Shoalzie wrote:

Roach wrote:Little boy walks in on his naked mother and sees her private frontal nudity.

"Gee Mom, what's that?!?"

His Mom explains "That's where God hit me with his hatchet"

"Wow, right in the cunt. Did it hurt?"

I think I heard Gilbert Gottfried tell that joke...it sounds funnier coming from him.

Actually, it reads better as:

"Good shot. He got you right in the cunt."

Martyred wrote:

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:

Roach wrote:A little girl walks in on her naked Dad, while he is shaving.

"Wow Dad, what's that!?!" she says staring at his unit.

"Oh that's my penis little darling..."

"Oooooh when do I get one?"

"In about 20 minutes when your mom goes to the store.

Has anyone laughed at this 'joke'... ever? :?

"Lighten up. It's hilarious!"

Sincerely,



MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!




...and a swift indictment to others.

Roach wrote:Maybe it hits ol' ucant a little too close to home to laugh.

Sexual abuse jokes, especially when they come to children, are not funny. Do you really think anyone who read that said:

"Oh yeah, so true. So true. I jam my cock down my daughter's throw everytime wifie goes to the store! Hah-ha."

Anyone who laughs at that joke is most likely a pedophile. Epic fail on the deflection, you sick fuck. Save for Diego in Seattle.... no one even gave a chuckle, you depraved piece of shit. Have fun trolling Chuckie Cheese for tail tonight. I hope you score.

Rack ucant.

I prefer scripted jokes in the written format so that way I can avoid them. Is there anything worse than "long winded joke guy?" I book for the nearest exit when I see that guy coming. Fucking tools.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:

Roach wrote:Maybe it hits ol' ucant a little too close to home to laugh.

Sexual abuse jokes, especially when they come to children, are not funny. Do you really think anyone who read that said:

"Oh yeah, so true. So true. I jam my cock down my daughter's throw everytime wifie goes to the store! Hah-ha."

Anyone who laughs at that joke is most likely a pedophile. Epic fail on the deflection, you sick fuck. Save for Diego in Seattle.... no one even gave a chuckle, you depraved piece of shit. Have fun trolling Chuckie Cheese for tail tonight. I hope you score.

Wasn’t it Roach that claimed a while back to have naked pictures of his girlfriend’s underage daughter?

No, it was ECCF who claimed to still give his teenaged daughter baths

Cuda wrote:No, it was ECCF who claimed to still give his teenaged daughter baths

I'm sure your rolodex is filled with notations of where to find kiddie porn, sicko.

Diego in Seattle wrote:

Cuda wrote:No, it was ECCF who claimed to still give his teenaged daughter baths

I'm sure your rolodex is filled with notations of where to find kiddie porn, sicko.

"I Know You're a Pedophile But What Am I?"

Is there some kind of toxic plume wafting northwest from Kansas City or something?

Cuda wrote:No, it was ECCF who claimed to still give his teenaged daughter baths

No, entirely different incident.

A pedo joke could be funny, I guess.

That one wasn't.

If we start qualifying joke material by some moral code, we'll end up with bill cosby material.

wanna hear some seriously wrong, but funny stuff. listen to doug stanhope.

Lot of pedos up in this bitch...or so the posts suggest.

A man & woman who never met are in the same sleeping car on a train - he in the top berth and she in the lower. Feeling cold, the man leans over & says, "Ma'am, sorry to bother you but would you get me a blanket from the closet?” The woman replies, “I have a better idea. Let's pretend we're married.” The man says, “That's a great idea!” “Good,” she replies, “Get your own fucking blanket!” After some silence, he farted.

Smackie Chan wrote:A man & woman who never met are in the same sleeping car on a train - he in the top berth and she in the lower. Feeling cold, the man leans over & says, "Ma'am, sorry to bother you but would you get me a blanket from the closet?” The woman replies, “I have a better idea. Let's pretend we're married.” The man says, “That's a great idea!” “Good,” she replies, “Get your own fucking blanket!” After some silence, he farted.

now that's funny.

If he had been in the bottom berth, he coulda given her The Dutch Oven treatment.

Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home.

Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, "Notice anything different about me?"

Margaret looked him over. "Nope."

Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots.

Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, "Notice anything different NOW?"

Margaret looked up and said, "Bert, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow."

Furious, Bert yelled, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET ?"

"Nope. Not a clue", she replied.

"IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!!!!"

Without missing a beat Margaret replied,

"Shoulda bought a hat, Bert.

“Shoulda bought a hat."

A little boy wakes up in the middle of the night and walks into his parents bedroom while they are having sex. He looks at them, then yells to his mom, "And you yell at me for sucking my thumb????"