Hey, Fish Get Glaucoma Too, Mon............oh yeah

[LTS TRN 2]

So, what....Jim "Rome" is going to to start his rote "hippie lettuce" drone again? And...

Here now, you snarky little imp, or pimp, you little weasel...incurring a beat down from my brother in law just to score a few ratings points...How about if I play a nine-iron Kush off your nose, then, eh? 'Scuse me, my house is on fire!...


WW

[Shoalzie]

Of course he gives the "I'm sorry that I was caught" apology when this comes out. Dude, just say you like to smoke pot...most people would appreciate the honesty although he'll catch hell from the uptight crowd. America probably doesn't want to know one of their prized athletes is just a typical kid that does dumb stuff...he's human.

[Screw_Michigan]

America doesn't like to hear it's possible to be extremely successul and still smoke marijuana and the government doesn't like having the war on drugs and programs like DARE proven to be the hypocritical travesties they are.

FTFY. Rack Phelps, by the way. I wonder if he'll catch more hell for this than his DUI.

[Q, West Coast Style]

IMO Phelps blew a huge opportunity with the textbook apology. Could've elevated himself from robotic celebrity to full blown rock star status had he just went with "Yeah, so what? 8 Gold Medals not good enough for you people? Getting up at 5 am not mature enough for ya? Oh no, I smoke weed, I might not make anything out of myself."

[Diego in Seattle]

IMO Phelps blew a huge opportunity with the textbook apology. Could've elevated himself from robotic celebrity to full blown rock star status had he just went with "Yeah, so what? 8 Gold Medals not good enough for you people? Getting up at 5 am not mature enough for ya? Oh no, I smoke weed, I might not make anything out of myself."

Yeah, because smoking (of anything) has no effect or is even good for aerobic conditioning.

Typical pothead logic.

[Q, West Coast Style]

IMO Phelps blew a huge opportunity with the textbook apology. Could've elevated himself from robotic celebrity to full blown rock star status had he just went with "Yeah, so what? 8 Gold Medals not good enough for you people? Getting up at 5 am not mature enough for ya? Oh no, I smoke weed, I might not make anything out of myself."

Yeah, because smoking (of anything) has no effect or is even good for aerobic conditioning.

Typical pothead logic.

You're right. He should of apologized for setting a bad example by using a bong instead of a vaporizer. If he used a vaporizer instead of a bong he would minimize such smoke exposure.

[Diego in Seattle]

I heard that his next move is to emmigrate to Canada to join their Olympic snow board team.

[Shoalzie]

Phelps could actually be brought up on charges
http://sports.espn.go.com/oly/swimming/ ... id=3881374

Good grief...

[Dinsdale]

Phelps could actually be brought up on charges
http://sports.espn.go.com/oly/swimming/ ... id=3881374

Good grief...

I'll go ahead and scratch South Carolina off my "places to visit" list.


Hey South Carolina... get a life. Then again, should we expect any different from a state that flies the Stars and Bars, and every year goes hog-wild celebrating a war they lost?


Just gives me more cause to RACK Oregon, where Phelps wouldn't be guilty of a "crime" for such acts.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Not only that but they couldn't be prouder to be a part of the mighty SEC, when the rest of the conference feels embarrassed to have them associated. I'll go ahead and RACK them though. They actually give the Big Ten a chance to kick the fuck out of an SEC team in a bowl game.

At least the rest of the state's got Clemson. That's working out pretty well for them. Uhh, yeah.

[Van]

CF talk, in particular Meatgrinder talk, will never grow old.

Civil War smack always works for me too.

Why couldn't we get ourselves a presidential ticket of Dins/Mgo, or Mgo/Dins, rather than what we were offered?

Dins/Mgo...now that would represent some mutherfuggen Change I Could Believe In.

Actually, come to think of it, a Dins/Mvscal ticket would be pretty sweet too.

Then again, wooo, a Nick Frisco/TVO ticket would be awesome too.

Just stir it up, one way or the other.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Sorry Van, I'm not much for politics, though I have my beliefs.

Dins would be too baked to get anything done. He'd have a three week old bill lying on his desk, waiting to be signed. After being pressured by his cabinet to sign it, he'd say, "hang on, I gotta tell this guy on the internet he's a fucking idiot for not knowing how to properly clean a cast iron skillet."

I'd vote for mvscal, just so I could say I called that guy a fucking faggot on a message board one time.

[RumpleForeskin]

Why couldn't we get ourselves a presidential ticket of Dins/Mgo

There isn't a flatbed big enough to relocate the Whitehouse to Portland.

[Van]

Mgo, you'd do it...for your country.

See, I'm just picturing all the behind closed door meetings with other heads of state. You and Dins, meeting up with Iranian and French diplomats.

Canadians, even. Their stunned reaction to formally being labeled "upper Mexicans."

Mvscal, meeting up with that chick who runs his favorite country, Germany. That'd just be swell.

Nick Frisco's first address to the Israeli people, and TVO's response to the first time some Russian politico lobbed an insult the U.S.'s way.

I'd be watching me some C-span, oh yah, you betcha...

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

"Cowan did not specify what charge was being considered and declined to discuss details of the investigation."

Exactly. Just another case of some public official doling out the usual bullshit rhetoric to the media. Gotta put on a "good front," for the public... ya know? Seriously. What's he supposed to say?

"It's okay to smoke pot in South Carolina. Heck, I was higher than a fucking kite when Mr. Phelps won his eighth gold medal."

Charges will not be brought. Don't kid yourselves....

[Van]

Mvscal, I didn't think you of all people would miss the sarcasm...

Or maybe I'm missing it now?

Regardless, President Mvscal addressing the throngs in Munich would be a downright hoot. Tea and shnitzel afterwards, where you first have the opportunity to get some things off your chest with Chancellor Merkel? Maybe the two of you having a nice chat as you take a quiet stroll together through some WWII monuments, like, oh, say, Buchenwald?

Yeah, I'd pony up the $40 PPV...

Then there'd be President Mvscal's first closed door meeting with representatives from the ACLU. That'd be a fun day too.

[Dinsdale]

Actually, come to think of it, a Dins/Mvscal ticket would be pretty sweet too.

Do you think we could abstain from calling each other "dumbfuck" long enough to get anything done?


Come to think of it, there's some brilliance with the plan -- the most efficient, æffective federal government is the one that does the least... to this end, mv and I would be perfect.


President mv: What policies should we explore today, dumbfuck?

VP Dins: I'm not a dumbfuck... YOU'RE a dumbfuck.

Presmv: What about this bailout thing... although I'm unsure why I'm asking a clueless fucktard dumbfuck like yourself about such things.

VPDins: Fuck you, asshat. The U&L invented bailouts, you know.

Prescal: That is without a doubt the most retarded statement ever made in the history of the White House.

VPDins: No, YOU'RE a dumbfuck! Let's move the federal reserve to Portland, OK?

Prescal: You're a dumbfuck.

VPDins: So... call it a day?

Prescal: Yup, let's go grab a brew.

VPDins: Oh fuck, here we go.


It would be political poetry-in-motion.

[MgoBlue-LightSpecial]

Damn, I can do a better Dins than Dins can do a Dins.

[ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2]

If I had to live anywhere in Europe it would be in France.

One can only assume your affinity for smoking cigarettes rivals that of your delight in smoking poles. Fuck the faggoty ass-smelling French.


But seriously. I've been to Europe a few times. I've been to Spain, Italy, Germany, and will be doing a 2.5 week tour of Ireland and Scotland this summer. I'd also like to visit The Czech Republic, more specifically, Prague next. I have no desire to visit France. Ever. What's the appeal? Besides its obvious gayness, that is...

[RumpleForeskin]

Damn, I can do a better Dins than Dins can do a Dins.

Funny....Dins would say the same thing about his own self.

[Dinsdale]

Damn, I can do a better Dins than Dins can do a Dins.

One of the inherent hazards of being a TCP/IP Caricature, I suppose.

[TVO]

Then again, wooo, a TVO/Nick Frisco ticket would be awesome too.

Get it right.

[Dinsdale]

Then again, wooo, a TVO/Nick Frisco ticket would be awesome too.

Get it right.

If a candidate is to "connect with the People," I'm guessing it's a prerequisite to be able to see over the podium at the debates.

[LTS TRN 2]

One thing's for sure, that a thousand or so professional athletes are secretly hoping that this might somehow tip the balance away from the Puritanical insanity that informs America's hemp policies. Just maybe the tide will shift...right here with the Human Fish. The gross hypocrisy of ass clowns like sheriff Lott is basically off the charts. And, of course, he's full of shit if he thinks he can even get an indictment, let alone a conviction. There's no smoke in the glass tube, no residue, and for that matter no definitive features of a "bong-pipe" are exposed in the photo. Sure, he was indeed huffing a schnoob (which really is bad for one's lungs), but his careful apology actually admits nothing.

As for the notion of babs as president, well in a variety of ways that's just what we had with Cheney. Connect the dots: Cheney's (actually hired) puppet is Rusp Limdick. Babs has diligently regurgitated virtually every Rovian/Limpdick position for many years like a wind-up doll. So...like the "presidency" of Cheney himself, babs would be bellicose, abrasive, paranoid, blundering, short-sighted, arrogant, and ultimately, just like Dick, a total and and absolutely unprecedented disaster--such a disaster, in fact, that the damage is all-but unrepairable.

WW

[Dinsdale]

LTS once again confused me with his cryptic wording...

But I assume it was a clumsy attempt at saying "TVO is short," right?

[Dinsdale]

even then you would have access to the best medical care you can afford.

I thought the Constitution clearly stated that it's everyone else's job to pay for that?

Sin,
BYeltsin

[Dinsdale]

I wouldn't even bother to submit a budget for most Federal agencies or nominate Cabinet Secretaries.

How about the Department of Energy?

Seems it was established to "reduce dependence on foreign energy sources." Yet we import a higher percentage now than we did at its inception.

Now, in most normal circles, where people breath through their nostrils and don't require a 24/7 drool cup, this would be known as a "complete failure." But in the Big Government Era, it's considered a "raging success," and warrants its 10,000 employees and it's buncha-billions budget.


Because we can only achieve prosperity in this country when half the people work to support the other half that watches over them... pure genius.

[Dinsdale]

How about the Department of Energy?

Dead.

Department of Education?

Dead

HUD?

Dead

HHS?

Dead

Cut a couple hundred billion here and there and soon we're talking about saving some real money.

If I admitted to a rapidly developing mancrush on mvscal, it would probably end badly for me, right?

[LTS TRN 2]

Total gibberish as usual from Rove Monkey. Of course Cheney was the real president, despite the recent suggestions that the Chimp distanced himself from the bunkered veep later on in the two unelected terms. And too the blather of Rusp Limpdick was essentially dictated by Rove personally, and Limpdick consistently parroted the basic line: Cut Corporate Taxes, Attack Iraq, Disregard Constitutional Law, Continue To Obey Israel, and Deregulate Everything. The rest--immigration reform, etc., was just distractions.

More to the point, babs--like Cheney--has been clearly proven wrong on every fucking issue over the past several years. It's a joke. And yet, like Cheney, babs just marches on in blind obdurate defiance of the facts, claiming he's right (believing it?) and hissingly dismissing any and all who disagree. Two of a kind, in some pathetic way.

Phelps, meanwhile, is keeping his endorsements--the sponsors--with their noses sniffing carefully--are realizing that indeed the Reefer Madness era is--or should be--over. Swim on, brother--like Rosa parks with webbed feet.

Sho nuff, when my arthritis flares up, I takes a lil' puff....and it's healin'

[Dinsdale]

Total gibberish as usual from Rove Monkey. Of course Cheney was the real president, despite the recent suggestions that the Chimp distanced himself from the bunkered veep later on in the two unelected terms. And too the blather of Rusp Limpdick was essentially dictated by Rove personally, and Limpdick consistently parroted the basic line: Cut Corporate Taxes, Attack Iraq, Disregard Constitutional Law, Continue To Obey Israel, and Deregulate Everything. The rest--immigration reform, etc., was just distractions.

More to the point, babs--like Cheney--has been clearly proven wrong on every fucking issue over the past several years. It's a joke. And yet, like Cheney, babs just marches on in blind obdurate defiance of the facts, claiming he's right (believing it?) and hissingly dismissing any and all who disagree. Two of a kind, in some pathetic way.

Thatwas a really complicated fart-joke, right?

[LTS TRN 2]

'splain yourself, Dins. Cheney was the de facto president. Okay? And Limpdick was indeed an actual paid mouthpiece for the unelected administration. It's not a matter of contention, and I only mention it to pound babs like a tent-peg.

Phelps is the story here.

Everyone in the pool!

[Dinsdale]

Phelps could actually be brought up on charges
http://sports.espn.go.com/oly/swimming/ ... id=3881374

Good grief...

Seeing more of this in the headlines...


Crackin up over here.

Maybe South Carolina should switch focus from persecuting burners... to like, say...

Maybe hiring a DA who actually has some reasonable chance of passing a bar exam in any state that doesn't field an SEC team.

Where is this marijuana Phelps allegedly smoked?

Any eyewitnesses with some sort of chemistry/related degree to offer some sort of expert testimony that Phelps was smoking marijuana?

Any... I dunno... any of that "evidence" thingy, beyond a random pic on the internet (and how fucking funny is it that a man with a public office is about the last to fall for "I saw it on the internet, it must be true")... BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!


???

Dude's really talking about some sort of proceedings?

Really?


Hell, TVO could get Phelps out of this one, butchered spelling/grammar and all.


If I lived in this tard's county, I'd be fucking pissed off that dude use on-the-job time, county resources, and his office to promote his own name (obviously for future gains) by making absolutely ridiculous statements about a "national hero"... that's fucking shameful, and here in Oregon, would be illegal (although he wouldn't get in trouble for it here, either).

What a self promoting POS this DA is... it's nice that there's no open cases, investigations, or any other pressing issues in dude's county... must be Utopia.


But I'll bet the fucking idiots who celebrate losing half their population in a war 140 years later are probably eating this shit up.

[smackaholic]

Lott played the part well. He wore stylish suits and had long hair then. He drove a Porsche seized from a drug dealer and even worked undercover with federal agents in Florida.

So, it's OK for a gubmint official to steal someone else's property, but, it's criminal for somebody to partake of something that might make him dumb, lazy and consume doritos for awhile.

Gawd, we're fukked.

[KC Scott]

Decent take on this by Kathleen Parker:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/co ... 02645.html

The pot laws are a joke and a horrific waste of taxpayer time and resources.

And no I don't partake - I did in my younger years but outgrew the desire to be lazy and get the munchies.

[LTS TRN 2]

Ms Parker is readin' my mind!

Phelps may be an involuntary hero to this charge, but his name and face bring necessary attention to a farce in which nearly half the nation are actors. It's time to recognize that all drugs are not equal -- and change the laws accordingly.

This is how change begins. Whether it's the Turkish Prime Minister dismissing the most venerable (and nominally sane) member of the Israeli government as a murderer, or a Human Fish having some land fun, good things can result.

WW

[smackaholic]

Yeah, all drugs ain't equal. I get that. But, if you are implying that gubmint ought to selectively legalize them, I beg to disagree.

Other than keeping them from minor children, I believe every fukking last one ought to be legal. Wanna do some crack? Go for it. Heroin? Why the fukk not. Make every last one of them legal and tax them. A plentiful supply ought to cul the herd nicely. And gawd knows, the herd does need culling.

[KC Scott]

A plentiful supply ought to cul the herd nicely. And gawd knows, the herd does need culling.

Spot on. The first week you'd have like 50,000 OD and that's 50,000 less losers taking up space or breaking into our cars.

Read a stat 70% of the US prison population is in for Drug / Related offenses - Shit, not like there isn't just a whole lot of money in keeping the jails full is there?

The politics behind the whole War on Drugs bullshit is really just the Money they can spend tying to enforce the unenforceable

[War Wagon]

And gawd knows, the herd does need culling.

How about we start with you?

The next time you type "gubmint" or any of your other inane gloss that you think is cool, we shoot you in the head.

Deal?

[smackaholic]

gubmint.

gubmint, gubmint, gubmint.

Just for you wags, I will never type government out in it's proper non gloss form again.

gubmint

[smackaholic]

Why do I have a feeling that legalizing any narcotics will result in a drastic decline in quality and potency?

Actually, legalizing it will reduce the cost. It will probably also increase the quality. It would also result in countless prison guards, DEA agents, cops and lawyers having to find honest productive work.