Get to know the Judges!!

[Biggie]

Dear Hopefuls,

Beating your opponent is only half the battle. You must also convince the Judges of your worth. Of course, the inner sanctum of the Judges' Chamber is cloaked in secrecy, but since you are putting yourselves and your Internet Reputations on the line, it seems only fair to offer a glimpse behind the meat curtains. So, C'mon!

Troll Train: Miss Conduct

Old school Momma. Has bought and sold more boards than Donald Trump. Married to Magicat, who is a serious perv when Australians are in town. Her stomach is stapled, collated and filed under Breasts. Not a great poster, but a superb gal. Favors power over substance. Meat curtains as far as the eye can see. One of my favorite board people.

The SmackBat: Biggie

3-time Poster of the Year Honoree, most recently at the extinct thetroll.com on the heels of a Robbery thread that amused and frightened dozens. Stabbed in the back by his own troops on several occasions. Enjoys soup and talking and not talking.

The Trolls dot Net: Russ

Emasculated former lover of NoCal Snowgirl. Carries lots of credit cards, and known to have multiple orgasms. Has a long-standing feud with many of the T1B denizens, and will probably be a no-show in the final judging.

T1B: Otis

4-time winner of Top Security Officer. Best lines: "Where the hell do you think you're going? Oh, OK then." and "Move along, ma'am." Those at the Bar know his true identity, but we're not telling. Actually, most of them will tell you for a few YouTube links - those guys are as two-faced as MissJo.

Stucknut: Dog

?? Your guess is as good as mine.

Hostboard: Cuda

A former member of Team Nutsack, pledging loyalty to VALVENIS and elgrandepeehole. Does a wonderful Dear Dottie impression. Runs a results-oriented SmackOff.

Mag7: Salad Tosser

Grew up in the shadow of The Fattest Sack, but soon eclipsed the master, snatching the cricket from the testicles. A superior poster with an inferiority complex, which makes him appear to be normal-sized in the correct light.

Good Luck!!

[jerome moore]

hello judges.

[Russ from SacTown]

The Trolls dot Net: Russ Has a long-standing feud with many of the T1B denizens

Not really, but a few of y'all are pricks though.

will probably be a no-show in the final judging.

Maybe, maybe not.

[DC Smackmaster]

Married to Magicat, who is a serious perv when Australians are in town. Her stomach is stapled, collated and filed under Breasts. Not a great poster, but a superb gal. Favors power over substance. Meat curtains as far as the eye can see. One of my favorite board people.

You sure know how to beat'em down and then love'm up again! That was like "Punch, Kick, Punch, Hug, Hug, Haymaker, Hug"

[Dinsdale]

Get on my case all you like, Big Man, but let it be known that a particular judge could win this thing going away.

The SmackBat: Biggie

Stabbed in the back by his own troops on several occasions.

I don't think I appreciate the insinuation here.

[SaladTosser]

:wavesuncomfortably:

[RadioFan]

The Trolls dot Net: Russ Has a long-standing feud with many of the T1B denizens

Not really, but a few of y'all are pricks though.

Word.

Rack Biggie, btw.

[Dinsdale]

A smackoff between the judges would be infinitely more entertaining-btw.

[RadioFan]

A smackoff between the judges would be infinitely more entertaining-btw.

They don't know it, but that's part of subsection 14, paragraph 46, line 12, as stated in the rules.

[SaladTosser]

A smackoff between the judges would be infinitely more entertaining-btw.

I'm guessing I could hold my own until the semi's, and then probably still squeak past Cuda's ctrl button. Oh, but in the finals, I would willfully play the part of asphalt to Biggie's Mrs. Rumplemass' clogs.

[haywood]

Doug "Biggie" Neidermeyer

Killed by his own moderators in the infamous TNW revolt of 2003.

[Dinsdale]

Sup, Brother Tosser?

Oh, but in the finals, I would willfully play the part of asphalt to Biggie's Mrs. Rumplemass' clogs.

Oh, there's some heavyweights floating in the Sea of Forgettable.

[SaladTosser]

Sup, Dins? Are you in this thing, or did you decide that a life of killing people from the peanut gallery threads would suit your interests better? If you ARE in, not to give my hand away, but half your cock is already in my mouth in anticipation of voting day.

[RadioFan]

Thanks, ST. I just ruined my monitor. God damn.

[Dinsdale]

Sup, Dins?

Just celebrating an extended return of an accomplished hogger.

Are you in this thing, or did you decide that a life of killing people from the peanut gallery threads would suit your interests better?

I was in, until I got an out of town dealio going, at which point I withdrew, but in true Dinsdalian style, made it sound like the whole thing was beneath me... same old same old.

If you ARE in, not to give my hand away, but half your cock is already in my mouth in anticipation of voting day.

Can't say I blame you, really.

[Cuda]

Hostboard: Cuda

A former member of Team Nutsack, pledging loyalty to VALVENIS and elgrandepeehole. Does a wonderful Dear Dottie impression. Runs a results-oriented SmackOff.

You forgot to mention that I'm known for my research.

And Dinsdale has buried more people than Calvin Natt, btw

[Dinsdale]

Calvin Natt

You suck.

[Biggie]

Dinsdale has buried more people than Calvin Natt, btw

I'm not a handicapper, but I'll give a slight lean to Dinsdale. Just kidding, I'm circling it. I don't like Dinsdale, I LOVE Dinsdale.

Time out.

[Biggie]

Hey Cood, you think PSU will let us go Rose Bowl on any of these matchups?

[Cuda]

And where is the Rose Bowl located-imo?

Dins is there, btw

[Charles De Mar]

Calvin Natt

You suck.

Are you too busy today, puto?

[NoCal's Unborn Child]

The Trolls dot Net: Russ Has a long-standing feud with many of the T1B denizens

Not really, but a few of y'all are pricks though.

will probably be a no-show in the final judging.

Maybe, maybe not.

DADDY!!

[Russ from SacTown]

DADDY!!

Nice try, but I never knocked her up. War protection for the erection!

You're thinking of Fubu knocking her up. The original "fetus" troll knew this. You must be a cheap knock off.

[NoCal's Unborn Child]

DADDY!!

Nice try, but I never knocked her up. War protection for the erection!

You're thinking of Fubu knocking her up. The original "fetus" troll knew this. You must be a cheap knock off.

Listen up Pops. It could be like 10 different guys. Until we all go on Maury then you are all the Daddy!

[Russ from SacTown]

Actually fetus if you remember the story, this is how it went.

NoCal moved out. One of my friends was looking to move out and needed a roommate and they were roommates for a month or two (she wouldn't pay rent timely so he booted her ). She took off to Indiana and came back with you inside. She told Fubu, Fubu called bullshit (thought she was lying). But my friend actually knew the story and kicked me down the details. Sorry but you had to go. Some things are for the better I guess.

[RadioFan]

The Trolls dot Net: Russ Has a long-standing feud with many of the T1B denizens

Not really, but a few of y'all are pricks though.

will probably be a no-show in the final judging.

Maybe, maybe not.

DADDY!!

[War Wagon]

Actually fetus if you remember the story, this is how it went.

NoCal moved out. One of my friends was looking to move out and needed a roommate and they were roommates for a month or two (she wouldn't pay rent timely so he booted her ). She took off to Indiana and came back with you inside. She told Fubu, Fubu called bullshit (thought she was lying). But my friend actually knew the story and kicked me down the details. Sorry but you had to go. Some things are for the better I guess.

Quite the baby mama drama, it would seem. So whose kid was it?

WAR never having these stupid problems in the first place. I can't imagine how a father turns his back on his child.

[Headhunter]

I can't imagine how a father turns his back on his child.

Yep, never know when she might jam her cock in you!