So I fucked a MILF in the Indianapolis Intl Airport restroom

[Mike Backer]

So I was sitting in the Memphis airport last week doing what any red blooded American male would do that had two hours to kill before his flight back to Indy; I pounded overpriced Keers Lights at the airport bar while I laid my my mojo on Carmen, a 38 year old divorced real estate agent from Charlotte. Sporting shoulder length black hair, dark olive skin, and full C cup boobies on her petite five foot five inch frame, I'm sure she would have been an all star fuck, but Carmen was put on this earth for batting practice only; a sexy pawn to help me elevate my mojo and hone my game to the level it needed to be at on the flight home. But that's neither here nor there. Instead of leaving said watering hole with plenty of time to catch my flight, I naturally squeezed in one last beer while I exchanged numbers with Carmen which left me scrambling to pay my tab and get back to my gate in time to make my plane.

With a little spring in my step, I was the last person to board. As I located my seat, I was stuck splitting a 3 seat row with a 250 pound pasty fat chick. Dammit. As I slipped past this porker and into my seat, I accidentally bumped the seat in front of me with my knee. When I leaned forward to apologize, I realized that the chick's chair that I inadvertently hit with my appendage contained a 40 something MILF with D cup tittays in a row all to herself with the plane three quarters full. After I apologized and we exchanged pleasantries, I asked her if she minded if I moved up and shared a row with her.

"Come on up before somebody else beats you to it" the little tart replied.

I detected horniness in her voice.

It. Is. On.

It turned out that Brenda has been married for 17 years, has 3 kids, and her husband turned into a bible banger on her about a year ago, so now they are in the midst of a nasty divorce. And as Brenda kept talking to me, she kept touching my arm which is always an excellent sign. So the flight attendant came by and I ordered up some vodka and she got a Miller Lite. The conversation went as follows:

"So, have you ever heard of the "The Mile High Club?" - Her
"I have." - Me
"Are you a member?" - Her
"I wish I was. Are you?" - Me
"I don't fly that much but it is definitely something I would like to do." - Her

Question: What kind of whore admits that to a stranger she just met?
Answer: One that wants to get fucked. That's who.

The flight from Memphis to Indianapolis is 63 minutes gate to gate, and I estimated that we were 45 minutes into the flight at this point as we started our descent. Since I was never going see this chick ever again, I decided to throw her a bone to she if she took it.

"It's too bad you aren't wearing a short skirt, or we could both check the Mile High Club off our 'To Do' list." - Me

(For all you rookies out there, here is where the sale is made. If she says "no", then game over. You asked for the sale, she denied you. You go back to the drawing board and learn from your mistakes. Now, if she says anything other than "no", she might as well be screaming "FUCK ME IN THE ASS BEAST MASTER!")

"So, if I waaaas wearing a skirt, how would we do it?" - Her

(Count it. Sale closed.)

"Well, we could either go back to the bathroom and you could ride me, or you could cover yourself with that blanket and we could spoon." - Me
"Oh, I see. Well, it's too bad I'm not wearing a skirt." - Her
"We could compromise." - Me
"What did you have in mind?" - Her
"Cover yourself with this blanket and let me work some magic with my fingers." - Me

In a very sexy, yet discrete way, Brenda covered herself with the blanket, fiddled around under it for 5 seconds to undo her belt and fly, and I proceeded to snake my middle finger between her thighs and start fingering her alarmingly cavernous bastard factory. Brenda immediately started moaning and writhing in ecstasy and my hand was instantly doused with pussy juice. This chick was so fucking horny that it felt like a horse was eating out of my palm. As I upped the fingering tempo, she leaned over and started kissing my neck and whispering dirty thoughts in my ear.

"Soooo, what's on your mind?" - Me, still fingering her
"How we absolutely have to fuck as soon as we get to the airport." - Her
"Where?" - Me
"Men's bathroom. In a stall." Her, whimpering.
"Are you sure?" - Me, playing hard to get.
"Definitely." - Her

So I discretely withdrew my slimed up digit from her insanely humid snatch and prepared for landing and the onslaught of fucking I hoped to pull off as soon as we got off the plane. Finally, we deplaned, and while it was a Wednesday evening at Indy International, the traffic in Concourse B's Men's Room was just too much to risk. However, 20 feet away from the men's room was the rather convenient "Family Washroom" for parents to change their screaming little shit factories without showcasing crap filled Pampers to the horror of the other people in the washrooms. But the best part of the "Family Washroom" was that it had a lock on the door, which is just what the doctor ordered. So I guided Brenda into the Family Washroom, locked the door, and proceeded to free my rather girthy hog for a cock polishing. Brenda slurped my crank to fully erect status and positioned herself to ride me when I told her to just lay on the floor as that would ensure that I got mine and got it rather quickly.

"You want me to lay ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR?" – Her
"They just cleaned it. We're good." - Me, lying
"Ooookay." - Her, hesitantly

So I got on top of her, and as I get ready to slide it to her, she slips into dirty talk mode because let's face it, she's no rookie.

"Are you gonna fuck me? Huh? Are you gonna fuck me hard?" - Her, in between licking my face and neck
"You've never tossed a billionaire's salad before, have you?" - Me, pumping away.
"Huh?" - Her
"Never mind." - Me, still pumping
"Give it to me big boy. Fuck me hard!" - Her
"Shut the fuck up before you get us arrested. By the way, where do you want me to cum?" - Me
"In my mouth." – Her
“GUUUHHHHHH!!!!” - Me

So I let out a lion’s roar as I splashed 56 grams of branched chain amino acid protein across her teeth and tonsils, and left her there to clean up while I walked to baggage claim. Spent.

[peter dragon]

the ending needs work

c+

[Y2K]

the ending needs work

c+

Agreed
If Indy is involved, nailing some skank twice is required.

[PSUFAN]

This chick was so fucking horny that it felt like a horse was eating out of my palm.

A

I let out a lion’s roar as I splashed 56 grams of branched chain amino acid protein across her teeth and tonsils, and left her there to clean up

A+

RACK Mike Backer. Dude picks his posts well

[Cuda]

a 38 year old divorced real estate agent from Charlotte. ..

I'll just go ahead and call bullshit on your little charade right now.

Unless you live in- or are moving to, or know someone who lives in, or is moving to- her marketing area, she won't waste 5 seconds on you. She's looking for clients; if she wants an orgasm, she has an enormous, vibrating, latex phallus-type thingie that would make Guy_Fawkes swoon at home in her closet for that

[War Wagon]

Now, if she says anything other than "no", she might as well be screaming "FUCK ME IN THE ASS BEAST MASTER!"

Excellent.

A+ read all the way.

[Raydah James]

Thats a RACK for MB.

[Dinsdale]

Possibly the best read since the last time Mr Backer regaled us with tales of his daring-do.


Outfreakingstanding.

[BSmack]

I'll just go ahead and call bullshit on your little charade right now.

Who cares if he's lying or not? The shit is funny.

[Jerkovich]

More like......"dear penthouse, yata yata yat..........."

c-

[Ken]

Rack the everliving daylights outta that.

It felt like a horse was eating out of my palm?
Fucking BWHAA.

[Ken]

More like......"dear penthouse, yata yata yat..........."

c-

If that's the case, then maybe a quick perusal of the latest issue for material should be in your future, dipshit. Up to now, the only item of note you've EVER added has been your slobber jettisoned from your mouth after yet another hoof trampling across your back.

[Dinsdale]

Always cracks me up when dudes take their frustrations from not being able to get laid in a whorehouse to the next level -- refusing to believe that other people actually do get laid on a regular basis.

[Dinsdale]

"You've never tossed a billionaire's salad before, have you?" - Me, pumping away.
"Huh?" - Her
"Never mind." - Me, still pumping

Was the best part.

[King Crimson]

"You've never tossed a billionaire's salad before, have you?" - Me, pumping away.
"Huh?" - Her
"Never mind." - Me, still pumping

Was the best part.

i was going to post the same thing.

[pron]

An excellent read, RACK.

[jtr]

[OCmike]

More like......"dear penthouse, yata yata yat..........."

c-

Right, because people lie all the time about nailing 40+ y/o mothers of three on the bathroom floor in an airport.

This just in...You're a fucking idiot.

[jtr]

I'm suprised Southwest let you on the plane tipsy.

[Tiny]

Good one, throw one more rack on the pile to go with 88's.

Dins is right about the Billionaire's salad comment, had me in tears.

Good job MB, another fine effort.

[Mike Backer]

I'm suprised Southwest let you on the plane tipsy.

It was Northwest, and unlike some of the pussies on this board, I'm not a sorority slut who gets bombed after 3 Smirnoff Ice's. I handle my booze like a man and I'd bet a nut that Brenda would vouch for me. Too bad I left it dripping off her wisdom teeth.

[Mister Bushice]

daring-do.

Idiot. Typical clavinism.


Oh, and Rack the Back.

"branched chain amino acid protein"?

Someone was banging his HS chemistry teacher.

[The Whistle Is Screaming]

The only thing that could have made that story better, would have been giving her a "Mike Backer" at the end.

Rack it!

[Screw_Michigan]

I'd bet a nut that Brenda would vouch for me. Too bad I left it dripping off her wisdom teeth.

RACK the story and RACK this balst. nice work, MB.

[XXXL]

Fiction or nonfiction, words well worth an A.......

[Rich Fader]

If it's legit...Mike is a mighty man. RACK him.

If it's a troll...Mike is a mighty troll. RACK him.

In any case...RACK him.

[General Peters]

I FUKKEN NEED ASS!!!

[Goober McTuber]

And the fact that you never get any speaks to what a complete and total fucking retard you are.

And Rack Mike Backer.

start fingering her alarmingly cavernous bastard factory

[Moorese]

"FUCK ME IN THE ASS BEAST MASTER!"

alarmingly cavernous bastard factory

This chick was so fucking horny that it felt like a horse was eating out of my palm.

"You've never tossed a billionaire's salad before, have you?" - Me, pumping away.
"Huh?" - Her
"Never mind." - Me, still pumping

Very nice work.

[General Peters]

That SHOULD have been the General pounding that MILF instead of Mike Backer

fukken fixed

[Goober McTuber]

That SHOULD have been the General pounding that MILF instead of Mike Backer

fukken fixed

Why don’t you get yourself “fukken fixed”? It’s painfully obvious you’ll never be pounding anything other than a tubesock. What a fucking tool.

[Goober McTuber]

I suppose you’re one of those who believe that General Peters is a truly gifted poster. I’m one of those who has watched his act long enough to think that he’s a racist, a pedophile and a loser. I don’t post at .net, so I’ll take my shots at him here, whenever and wherever he shows up.

Oh damn, 88 doesn’t like my post. How terribly distressing.

In such circumstances, we would immediately takes a giant shit and start eating it to the chagrin of all.

English, motherfucker. Do you speak it?

[KC Scott]

Hilarious Branny.

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