any poker players here? read this

It's the 17th Anniversary for T1B - Fuckin' A

Moderator: Jesus H Christ

Post Reply
User avatar
Trollfessor
Mary Ann tried harder, Ginger was better
Posts: 193
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 9:16 pm

any poker players here? read this

Post by Trollfessor »

Zee Justin "screwed up". :evil:

No, Zee. You cheated. :evil:

I knew there cheating going on. :evil:
User avatar
Nishlord
Eternal Scobode
Posts: 2864
Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2005 7:46 pm

Post by Nishlord »

Being able to make a living from poker only makes you slightly less of a loser than the other losers who play it .
“Culture. Sophistication. Genius. A little bit more than a hot dog, know what I mean?”
User avatar
Diogenes
The Last American Liberal
Posts: 6985
Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 7:00 pm
Location: Ghost In The Machine

Post by Diogenes »

Nishlord wrote:Being able to make a living in the porn industry only makes you slightly less of a loser than the other losers who pay for it .
Message brought to you by Diogenes.
The Last American Liberal.

ImageImage
User avatar
Dinsdale
Lord Google
Posts: 33414
Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2005 5:30 pm
Location: Rip City

Post by Dinsdale »

HUH?

You mean people cheat at Party Poker? I refuse to believe such nonsense.

Sin,
PokerBot

Are people just now figuring out that about 90% of online players are cheating?
I got 99 problems but the 'vid ain't one
Goober McTuber
World Renowned Last Word Whore
Posts: 25891
Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 1:07 pm

Post by Goober McTuber »

They're marking the cards.
Joe in PB wrote: Yeah I'm the dumbass
schmick, speaking about Larry Nassar's pubescent and prepubescent victims wrote: They couldn't even kick that doctors ass

Seems they rather just lay there, get fucked and play victim
User avatar
Dinsdale
Lord Google
Posts: 33414
Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2005 5:30 pm
Location: Rip City

Post by Dinsdale »

Jsc810 wrote:How are 90% cheating?
"Team play," like in the article.

Worse are the bots. Party Poker is for all intents and purposes, just a computer program. There's more than one person in the world that knows how to write a computer program.

Light coming on?


If you're not ahead of the game, there's always going to be somebody who knows exactly what cards you're holding on every hand. Taking countermeasures increases your winning percentage dramatically.
I got 99 problems but the 'vid ain't one
User avatar
Y2K
Internet Overlord
Posts: 2830
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 8:07 am
Location: Fresno CA.

Post by Y2K »

Jsc810 wrote:
Dinsdale wrote:Taking countermeasures increases your winning percentage dramatically.
Countermeasures? Like what? Never playing online?
It's a good idea. If you think you're actually going to win then you are just the guy these casinos are looking for. Like slot machines, payouts are regulated by computer and they have bots ready to fleece your account right after they make you think you're a big time poker "stud" (pun intended). Team play has been around these places for a long time.
I only play at real card parlors with real people...
User avatar
Dinsdale
Lord Google
Posts: 33414
Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2005 5:30 pm
Location: Rip City

Post by Dinsdale »

Y2K wrote:I only play at real card parlors with real people...
Yeah well...you're probably one of those guys who actually HAS been playing for a long time. Just fucking boggles my mind how many "I've been playing forever" people mysteriously came out of the woodwork when ESPN started airing poker.

But, for that tiny, tiny percentage that really HAVE been playing for decades, this current trend of "I've been doing this forever, I'm the MAN" menatlity amongst these fucking liars has been nothing but profitable. Those people had never even heard of poker, much less knew how to play, but then suddenly it's on ESPN, and the empty-pride within them has to tell the world "I'm old-school," which is a bald faced lie for 80-90% of them...and it really shows in their play.

But, I don't belittle them for it...in fact, I encourage it...easy money.

I'm not much of an online gamer myself, but I just recently got a demo of "how it's done," and wow...what an eye-opener. You really don't want to be in that 1% that's ignorant of the cheating.
I got 99 problems but the 'vid ain't one
User avatar
Dinsdale
Lord Google
Posts: 33414
Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2005 5:30 pm
Location: Rip City

Post by Dinsdale »

Jsc810 wrote: Is that online somewhere?
Maybe. One of my old friends is a diehard player (constitutes about half of his professional life these days), and he showed me some interesting stuff just a few days ago.

There's about 8,000,000 programs out there that do nothing but sniff out what the other online players' hands are. Isn't too tough to open a chat window with 5 of the 6 people at a table in it. Isn't too hard to start a conference call with your buddies who are all in the same 20 person tourney, who then go to a private table to split up all the money they just cheated you out of.

When you sign that user agreement that says "play at your own risk," they weren't freaking kidding.

But once you realize it's ascam (I didn't until these diehards showed/told me all about it), you're better prepared to make the decision to participate, and protect yourself if you do choose to do so.


In online poker, as in every other aspect of life, you're well-served to remember Rule #1 -- There's a lot of people out there who aren't as honest as you are.


Wait....aren't you some kind of lawyer, JSC?

Nevermind. Rule #1 doesn't apply to you. But everyone else is well served by keeping Rule #1 in mind.
I got 99 problems but the 'vid ain't one
User avatar
JIMMY_JUNK
Jake
Posts: 50
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2005 3:47 pm

Post by JIMMY_JUNK »

I PLAY POLKA MUSIC JUST TO PISS OFF MY NEIGHBORS!!

YOU SHOULD SEE ME DANCE.... HOOTZKHTA!
HOLY _____! LMMFAO!!! LOL:
:lOl: YOU SON OF A ______!
YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING BOOZE AGAIN!!!
User avatar
See You Next Wednesday
De Gustibus Non Est Disputandum
Posts: 1487
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 9:34 pm

Post by See You Next Wednesday »

Eh, I've done alright, staying at the low low stakes games. I won $1200 over the course of two tourneys in December and won another $200 just playing cheap ring games. Not enough for anyone to be impressed, but enough to keep me entertained.

If folks are cheating at the games I play in, they aren't very good at it. But I assume they are generally in the bigger money games anyway.
"As democracy is perfected, the office of president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron."
- H.L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
User avatar
Y2K
Internet Overlord
Posts: 2830
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 8:07 am
Location: Fresno CA.

Post by Y2K »

See You Next Wednesday wrote:Eh, I've done alright, staying at the low low stakes games. I won $1200 over the course of two tourneys in December and won another $200 just playing cheap ring games. Not enough for anyone to be impressed, but enough to keep me entertained.

If folks are cheating at the games I play in, they aren't very good at it. But I assume they are generally in the bigger money games anyway.
You can rest assured that they know exactly how much you have won, think of it as getting free booze at the casino table.
Good Luck.... :lol:
User avatar
Dinsdale
Lord Google
Posts: 33414
Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2005 5:30 pm
Location: Rip City

Post by Dinsdale »

See You Next Wednesday wrote:but enough to keep me entertained.
That's'what'it's'all'about.

And the people I know who actually pull a few bucks online seem to have the same philosophy as you. Must be something to it.
I got 99 problems but the 'vid ain't one
User avatar
Neely8
2016 JAFFL Champ
Posts: 2243
Joined: Sat Jan 15, 2005 7:47 am
Location: Arizona
Contact:

Post by Neely8 »

I did alright at Poker Stars but no longer play online. Foxwoods or bust......
New England Patriots
2001, 2003, 2004, 2014, 2016 Champions

Boston Red Sox
2004, 2007, 2013 Champions

Boston Celtics
2008 Champions

Boston Bruins
2011 Champions
Eaglebauer
Elwood
Posts: 401
Joined: Mon May 02, 2005 8:08 pm

Post by Eaglebauer »

Dinsdale wrote:
Jsc810 wrote: Is that online somewhere?
Maybe. One of my old friends is a diehard player (constitutes about half of his professional life these days), and he showed me some interesting stuff just a few days ago.

There's about 8,000,000 programs out there that do nothing but sniff out what the other online players' hands are.
<cough>Bullshit <cough>
Eaglebauer
Elwood
Posts: 401
Joined: Mon May 02, 2005 8:08 pm

Re: any poker players here? read this

Post by Eaglebauer »

Trollfessor wrote:Zee Justin "screwed up". :evil:

No, Zee. You cheated. :evil:

I knew there cheating going on. :evil:
I particularly like his whining about PartyPoker confiscating his funds, which they god-damn well should have.

He didn't "realize" it was wrong until they took away his incentive to cheat, obviously.
User avatar
tough love
Agondonter
Posts: 1886
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2005 12:01 pm
Location: Prison Urantia

Post by tough love »

Poker is a sport that should be allowed to take part in the Olympics. :meds:
At that time, I unfortunately did not realize that what I was doing was unethical.
Unbelieveable.

Could this revelation be the straw which breaks that camels back?
Internet Texas Hold'em's has taken off like wild fire.
Now we got an admission on how easily these games can be fixed.
Given the state of stupidity that is running rampant about this sorry earth, my guess is that this won't even faze the chumps who frequent these scams, as long as the suckers get the occasional crumb.

Different Strokes, I reacon.
Am I wrong...God, I hope so.
Post Reply