The "real" Iran war report.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

ISRAEL: "Oh man, enough of this bullshit! We are going to fuck Iran up...big time!"

AMERICA: "Look, don't do anything stupid..."

ISRAEL: "Seriously dawg...it's fucking GO TIME! We're throwing down!"

AMERICA: "Easy..."

ISRAEL: "I mean...unless you guys want in on this sweet action. 'CAUSE IT'S FUCKING ON!"

AMERICA: "No. Just calm down."

ISRAEL: "That's alright...THINGS ARE GOING TO GET KUUUHHHH-RAYYYY-ZEEEE!!! Beatdowns a' plenty!!! Uhhh...you sure you don't want a piece?"

AMERICA: "Not really. We're already jammed up in Iraq and Afghanistan. Don't get us wrong...but, uhhh...darn...would you look at the time? Gotta run. L8."

ISRAEL: "Yeah...uhhh...okay. That's alright, we'll get 'er done! Any minute now! Oh, it's going down!!! Any moment...



Ohhh!!! This is your lucky day Iran! If only there was someone here to hold our jacket...BOOM! Lights out muthahfuckas! Seriously, your LUCKY DAY! Well alright then. Just watch it. We've got our eye on you. We're watching you.
Next time...for real. You're just lucky these are my new Italian loafers and I don't want to scuff them up..."

[War Wagon]

[MadRussian]

Uhhh Israel HAS taken out reactors before, just fyi

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Uhhh Israel HAS taken out reactors before, just fyi

They've also taken out an American naval vessel.

What's your point?

[MadRussian]

Is that they certainly dont need anyone to "hold their jacket" to take decisive action :?

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Is that they certainly dont need anyone to "hold their jacket" to take decisive action :?

If the Israelis are such paragons of rugged masculinity, why are their lobbyists pushing hard on you to take out their trash?

[The Seer]

Uhhh Israel HAS taken out reactors before, just fyi

They've also taken out an American naval vessel.

What's your point?

What's your point? That Israel is the bad guy and iran is the good guy? Having that constant American security blanket makes the canadian brain go soft...while barking like a chihuahua...

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

#1 on that really thin book list?

"Canadian Military Acheivements"

Real important to you, isn't it? Killing people...

Your country barely produces anything anymore. Just service sector drone slots for the mouthbreathers and dropping bombs on dudes in sandals.

Yeah...I'm so ashamed of Canada's lack of "military achievements" like blowing up aid stations and schools.

[Dinsdale]

#1 on that really thin book list?

"Canadian Military Acheivements"

Did you read the chapter on "Canada defeats the Germans and takes back Denmark/Netherlands"?

Or the part where they established a beachhead at Normandy and had greater success at penetrating inland than the US or British did?

[Truman]

^^^^^^^^^^

Too much Upton Sinclair/Not enough Gordon Sinclair up in this one....

[War Wagon]

Your country barely produces anything anymore.

14 trillion dollar GDP says what?

That's twice of what Japan and China produce, combined.

STFU Marty.

[mvscal]

Or the part where they established a beachhead at Normandy and had greater success at penetrating inland than the US or British did?

Kind of an asinine comparison. The terrain, level of opposition and objectives were different at each of the five beaches.

[Dinsdale]

Or the part where they established a beachhead at Normandy and had greater success at penetrating inland than the US or British did?

Kind of an asinine comparison. The terrain, level of opposition and objectives were different at each of the five beaches.

Understood.

I just get a kick out of those who denigrate canadian military endeavors, when those canatards put together a ridiculously large fighting force in WW2, and fought valiantly and effectively, and were certainly a major asset to the Allies.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Until of course something happens close to home.

Close to home?

America has been incinerating homes, schools, hospitals, water treatment facilities...etc...for decades.

But of course, history began on Sept. 11th, right?

[LTS TRN 2]

Real important to you, isn't it? Killing people....

The hand wringing doves all want a beautiful world of peace and love where everyone respects everyone's beliefs and ideals.
Until of course something happens close to home.

Think Martytard's attitude changes if he had lost a sister or brother in the WTC?

Talkin' controlled demolitions? Hey, I lost a sugar daddy..but I'm in love...and yes, I have large breasts,...huh?...never mind..


Does Martytard still criticize killing people then? Turn the other cheek?

It's never real until it happens close to home Martytard - that's the hypocracy of your idealism

[Truman]

Until of course something happens close to home.

Close to home?

America has been incinerating homes, schools, hospitals, water treatment facilities...etc...for decades.

But of course, history began on Sept. 11th, right?

Of course you DO realize you post this tripe under an Umbrella of Freedom secured by the blood of your American cousins, right?

[War Wagon]

I'd prefer to believe Marty just likes to push buttons and doesn't really buy into some of the bullshit he posts.

But I could be wrong.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Notice how Martytrad didn't answer this?......

I did, you dolt.

I thought it was pretty clear that I believed 9/11 to be a retaliation.

That's exactly what the heroes did on that day. They fought back. Against America, the New Soviet Union.

[Truman]

Au contraire, Merdé

"...this Canadian thinks it is time to speak up for the Americans as the most generous, and possibly the least-appreciated, people in all the earth.

As long as sixty years ago, when I first started to read newspapers, I read of floods on the Yellow River and the Yangtze. Well who rushed in with men and money to help? The Americans did, that's who.

They have helped control floods on the Nile, the Amazon, the Ganges, and the Niger. Today, the rich bottom land of the Mississippi is under water and no foreign land has sent a dollar to help. Germany, Japan, and, to a lesser extent, Britain and Italy, were lifted out of the debris of war by the Americans who poured in billions of dollars and forgave other billions in debts. None of those countries is today paying even the interest on its remaining debts to the United States.

When the franc was in danger of collapsing in 1956, it was the Americans who propped it up, and their reward was to be insulted and swindled on the streets of Paris. And I was there -- I saw that. When distant cities are hit by earthquake, it is the United States that hurries into help, Managua, Nicaragua, is one of the most recent examples.

So far this spring, fifty-nine American communities have been flattened by tornadoes. Nobody has helped.

The Marshall Plan, the Truman Policy, all pumped billions upon billions of dollars into discouraged countries. And now, newspapers in those countries are writing about the decadent, war-mongering Americans.

Now, I'd like to see just one of those countries that is gloating over the erosion of the United States dollar build its own airplanes.

Come on now, you, let's hear it! Does any other country in the world have a plane to equal the Boeing Jumbo Jet, the Lockheed Tristar, or the Douglas 10? If so, why don't they fly them? Why do all international lines except Russia fly American planes? Why does no other land on earth even consider putting a man or a woman on the moon?

You talk about Japanese technocracy and you get radios. You talk about German technocracy and you get automobiles. You talk about American technocracy and you find men on the moon, not once, but several times, and, safely home again. You talk about scandals and the Americans put theirs right in the store window for everyone to look at. Even the draft dodgers are not pursued and hounded. They're right here on our streets in Toronto. Most of them, unless they're breaking Canadian laws, are getting American dollars from Ma and Pa at home to spend up here.

When the Americans get out of this bind -- as they will -- who could blame them if they said "the hell with the rest of the world." Let somebody else buy the bonds. Let somebody else build or repair foreign dams, or design foreign buildings that won't shake apart in earthquakes." When the railways of France, and Germany, and India were breaking down through age, it was the Americans who rebuilt them. When the Pennsylvania Railroad and the New York Central went broke, nobody loaned them an old caboose. Both of 'em are still broke.

I can name to you 5,000 times when the Americans raced to the help of other people in trouble. Can you name to me even one time when someone else raced to the Americans in trouble? I don't think there was outside help even during the San Francisco earthquake.

Our neighbors have faced it alone, and I am one Canadian who is damned tired of hearing them kicked around. They'll come out of this thing with their flag high. And when they do, they're entitled to thumb their noses at the lands that are gloating over their present troubles. I hope Canada is not one of these. But there are many smug, self-righteous Canadians.

And finally, the American Red Cross was told at its 48th Annual meeting in New Orleans this morning that it was broke.

This year's disasters -- with the year less than half-over -- has taken it all. And nobody, but nobody, has helped."

[Goober McTuber]

"We are a nation that has a government — not the other way around. And this makes us special among the nations of the Earth. Our government has no power except that granted it by the people. It is time to check and reverse the growth of government which shows signs of having grown beyond the consent of the governed." —Ronald Reagan, Inaugural address, Jan. 20, 1981

[Truman]

^^^^^^^^^^

...a Canadian jumbo jet full of aids-infested Islamic suicide bombers couldn't kill you fast enough.

Just die, Loser.

[Goober McTuber]

Because Ronnie really reversed the growth of government, right? Typical KC brilliance on display.

[Truman]

Try defining government growth "beyond the consent of the governed", asshat. Might wanna take a look around these days. I await your enlightened Madison response.

[Goober McTuber]

So you're saying that "the governed" were hoping for a massive increase in the national debt?

[LTS TRN 2]

Au contraire, Merdé

"When the Americans get out of this bind -- as they will -- who could blame them if they said "the hell with the rest of the world." Let somebody else buy the bonds. "

Okay, are you going to tell this wind up squirrel that the U.S. has been debt financed ever since Reagan? You know...? That we rely on the Japanese (by law) and the Chinese (by wary calculation) to BUY OUR (JUNK) BONDS!!!!! Or we go bankrupt immediately....right? you're aware of this basic fact?

HELLO?.....

WW

[Truman]

Au contraire, Merdé

"When the Americans get out of this bind -- as they will -- who could blame them if they said "the hell with the rest of the world." Let somebody else buy the bonds. "

Okay, are you going to tell this wind up squirrel that the U.S. has been debt financed ever since Reagan? You know...? That we rely on the Japanese (by law) and the Chinese (by wary calculation) to BUY OUR (JUNK) BONDS!!!!! Or we go bankrupt immediately....right? you're aware of this basic fact?

HELLO?.....

WW

What I’m AWARE of, besides the fact that you’re criminally unreadable, is that ol’ Gordo’s been enjoying an uninterrupted dirt nap going on 37 years now.

Dern. Troll for northerns, snag a carp. Just as well throw you up on the bank to rot ...

[Truman]

So you're saying that "the governed" were hoping for a massive increase in the national debt?

There's debt... And then there's unsustainable, generations-crippling debt (see Obama, Barrack). Of course, you paid cash for every house and car that you've ever bought. Non-starter, Goobs.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

No that's not an answer to the question - which was: if you lost someone in one a terrorist attack would your bloodlust roar for vengence or would you turn the other cheek?

Quite a simple question - really.

The whole basis of your argument is that 9/11 was an unprovoked attack. It wasn't. It was a retaliation.

The point you're trying to make actually compliments my assertion.

If America bankrupted your country, bombed the shit out of it and murdered it's democratic political aspirants, would you demand blood?

To answer your question, yes, I would. Don't be surprised that by your own logic, karma is kicking you in the ballsack.

[Goober McTuber]

So you're saying that "the governed" were hoping for a massive increase in the national debt?

There's debt... And then there's unsustainable, generations-crippling debt (see Obama, Barrack). Of course, you paid cash for every house and car that you've ever bought. Non-starter, Goobs.

When did I ever mention Obama? Your cute little quote still looks pretty stupid.

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

I didn't ask if you thought it was an unprovoked attack or a retaliation

It's an important distinction. You seem to want to gloss over it.

So if one close to you were lost then you agree you would demand vengence.

Good to see you think so little of your innocent canadian brethern that were lost in the incidents I previously linked.

I'll just point to that as proof of your hypocracy

Throw rocks at a hornet's nest so you can blame the hornets for stinging you.

[Cuda]

Real important to you, isn't it? Killing people....

The hand wringing doves all want a beautiful world of peace and love where everyone respects everyone's beliefs and ideals.
Until of course something happens close to home.

Think Martytard's attitude changes if he had lost a sister or brother in the WTC?

Talkin' controlled demolitions? Hey, I lost a sugar daddy..but I'm in love...and yes, I have large breasts,...huh?...never mind..


Does Martytard still criticize killing people then? Turn the other cheek?

It's never real until it happens close to home Martytard - that's the hypocracy of your idealism

I wish she wouldn't hold that damn flyer in front of her tits like that

[Bizzarofelice]

Don't worry Marty, we'll protect you

from what? from whom?

[Shlomart Ben Yisrael]

Don't worry Marty, we'll protect you

from what? from whom?

From horrible baseball trolls.

[Dr_Phibes]

Greenland, apparently.

[Bizzarofelice]

Greenland, apparently.

No, global warming doesn't exist so that melting ice is no threat.

who let all this riff-raffinto the room?

[Dr_Phibes]

Greenlanders. Always leaving the door open, letting the heat out, no consideration for others. Flying their float planes into populated lakes