Well, that didn't take long.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 6:23 pm

Lil miss smackaholic got her license about a week ago. A few hours ago she decided it was a good idea to make a left turn right in front of a big ass truck.

Anybody got a minivan or maybe pickup truck they're interested in selling?

I'm in the market for a new rig.

BTW, ms. s is OK......til I get home. :|

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 6:40 pm

How's the truck?

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 6:57 pm

Glad to hear she's OK, dude.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 7:08 pm

PSUFAN wrote:Glad to hear she's OK, dude.

Ditto.

Say hello to sky high insurance rates for the next 5 years or so.

My daughter rear ended some guy and trashed her car when she was 18. She's 21 now and thankfully hasn't had another accident since.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 7:11 pm

War Wagon wrote:My daughter rear ended some guy

Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree much?

indyfrisco · Post by **indyfrisco** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 7:25 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:
War Wagon wrote:My daughter rear ended some guy
Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree much?

Stole my thunder...though I was going to say "Softball chicks do that."

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 7:51 pm

IndyFrisco wrote: Stole my thunder...though I was going to say "Softball chicks do that."

And what epic "thunder" that would've been... if only Goobs hadn't stolen it from you, the bastard.

Imus · Post by **Imus** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:11 pm

It might be a blessing. Hopefully it shook her up a lot and made her pull her head out of her ass, and realize all other drivers are ignorant of their surroundings.

A minor accident now, and ever alert.

And you thought i was just an ass hole maybe. Does she have nappy hair?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:35 pm

Mikey wrote:How's the truck?

Some fuggin' douche in a ford pickup.

I hate those guys.

Prolly a f-250, as they are the worst.

Anyway, it was towed as well, but, unlike the villager will live to see another day. The villager, on the other hand is as dead as diogenes' troll.

She was turning left. He hit her right in the read sliding door and ripped the rear wheel clean off.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:35 pm

PSUFAN wrote:Glad to hear she's OK, dude.

me too. thanks.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:38 pm

War Wagon wrote:
PSUFAN wrote:Glad to hear she's OK, dude.
Ditto.

Say hello to sky high insurance rates for the next 5 years or so.

My daughter rear ended some guy and trashed her car when she was 18. She's 21 now and thankfully hasn't had another accident since.

I said hello to sky high rates last week when we added her to the policy. Now I get to say hi to low earth orbit high rates. If she had a pair of balls she'd ~~be a softball player~~ have geostationary orbit high rates.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:39 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:
War Wagon wrote:My daughter rear ended some guy
Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree much?

thanks, dude. I need all the laughs I can get right now.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:46 pm

Jsc810 wrote:She wasn't hurt.

Nothing else matters.

Count your blessings.

yup.

cars are replacable. especially 11 year old minvans.

goddamn, that was a good rig though. Bought it with 65K on the clock 5+ years ago. Put 80k more on it. Wouldn't be quite as pissed if I hadn't spent about 1300 bucks on it over the last 6 months. New t-belt, water pmp, windshield, egr work.

Oh fukking well. Atleast I'm not AP.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:48 pm

Imus wrote:It might be a blessing. Hopefully it shook her up a lot and made her pull her head out of her ass, and realize all other drivers are ignorant of their surroundings.

A minor accident now, and ever alert.

And you thought i was just an ass hole maybe. Does she have nappy hair?

I was talking to some dude at work this afternoon about the same thing. I guess it's a cheap lesson. Some brain dead teens find out tha driving is serious by killing themselves or somebody else.

Shlomart Ben Yisrael · Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:49 pm

smackaholic wrote: If she had a pair of balls she'd ~~be a softball player~~ have geostationary orbit high rates.

At least there wasn't an open liquor bottle in the car.

Your rates would be practically caught up with Voyager 2, halfway to Alpha Centauri at this point

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 10:50 pm

smackaholic wrote:
Mikey wrote:How's the truck?
Some fuggin' douche in a ford pickup.

I hate those guys.

Prolly a f-250, as they are the worst.

Anyway, it was towed as well, but, unlike the villager will live to see another day. The villager, on the other hand is as dead as diogenes' troll.

She was turning left. He hit her right in the read sliding door and ripped the rear wheel clean off.

Damn. She did get hammered. Glad she didn't get hurt. Those Fords can be brutal.

We used to have a '94 Villager. When we were living in Vegas the OL got rear-ended by a pickup when she decided to stop for a red light and he was thinking for some reason that they would both blast through the intersection.

Put a nice scratch on the rear bumper of the Merc, and completely totalled the front end of the pickup. Dude was flabbergasted. I guess damage level always depends on the angle of attack.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 11:05 pm

Mikey wrote:
smackaholic wrote:
Mikey wrote:How's the truck?
Some fuggin' douche in a ford pickup.

I hate those guys.

Prolly a f-250, as they are the worst.

Anyway, it was towed as well, but, unlike the villager will live to see another day. The villager, on the other hand is as dead as diogenes' troll.

She was turning left. He hit her right in the read sliding door and ripped the rear wheel clean off.
Damn. She did get hammered. Glad she didn't get hurt. Those Fords can be brutal.

We used to have a '94 Villager. When we were living in Vegas the OL got rear-ended by a pickup when she decided to stop for a red light and he was thinking for some reason that they would both blast through the intersection.

Put a nice scratch on the rear bumper of the Merc, and completely totalled the front end of the pickup. Dude was flabbergasted. I guess damage level always depends on the angle of attack.

Yeah, it's all about angle of attack. Many moons ago, the OL was driving our old corolla hatchback. Lil miss smack was strapped into her car seat in the back (damn, I miss those days). The OL was fussing with her and some jmoke in a ratty old nova slammed on his brakes because he thought his rug rat was choking on a lolly pop. The OL slammed on her brakes at the last moment as she plowed into the nova. Her bumper went under the nova's bumper. He drove away with nothing. The corolla went to heaven.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Tue Nov 18, 2008 11:08 pm

Mikey wrote:...the OL got rear-ended by a pickup .....

full of messicans?

is that troll still around or was it over at ,net?

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 12:59 am

smackaholic wrote:Her bumper went under the nova's bumper. He drove away with nothing. The corolla went to heaven.

And the moral of this story is... that Toyota got what it deserved.

Rack that virtually indestuctible Nova.

My dad bought a new Nova in 1970 about a year before he died. My mom and then my older brother drove that rusted out piece of shit for about 20 years before it, too, went to "heaven".

And if you're a redneck like me, especially when I was younger, going to a junkyard and trying to find parts is a sublime experience, akin to bass fishin' or deer hunting.

Busted many a fucking knuckle and scraped many a knee wrenching rusted parts and climbing over and around wrecked derelicts.

And you look at all those former living, breathing souls and realize that each one had so many stories to tell, if only they could talk.

The places they've been, the things they've seen. The 18 year old Goober who got his first piece of ass in the back seat of a '57 T-bird at the drive-in theater... or in TVO's case, gave his first blowjob in the front seat of his '69 Dodge Dart while his buddy was driving them to band practice.

And now they're just a piece of scrap, getting ready for the crusher and then the shredder to erase its memory from existance.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 1:34 am

If the rolls were reversed, it would have been the pos nova going to heaven. Bumpers trump grills and radiators. It's that fuggin' simple.

And rack the hell out of boneyards that still let you pick through their yards. Getting harder to find such places.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 2:21 am

smackaholic wrote:If the rolls were reversed, it would have been the pos nova going to heaven.

And if your aunt had a package, she'd be your uncle.

And rack the hell out of boneyards that still let you pick through their yards. Getting harder to find such places.

No shit.

Recently I was looking for a wheel cover for a 2004 Grand Am for wifeys car after she lost it having a blow out down near Springfield.

We've got this yard here called U-wrench-it where they charge you $2 just for the pleasure of walking up and down row after freaking row of late model junkers. Fucks all over the place scavenging, some bring air-compressors and 15 drawer Craftsmen tool chests.

I didn't find the wheel cover after 30 minutes, but it was well worth the money. sniff... brought a tear or two to my eye.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 10:15 am

Some fukker pushing a roll around through the pick and pull?

Awesome.

Those places are usually mudholes. Did he have mudder tires on the fukking thing?

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 10:24 am

One other thing.

We dropped collision coverage last month.

You're fukking welcome, AIG.

Mikey · Post by **Mikey** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 3:50 pm

smackaholic wrote:One other thing.

We dropped collision coverage last month.

You're fukking welcome, AIG.

Sounds like you're gonna need a bailout.

Download this:
Bailout Application

Fill it out and send it immediately to:

Department of the Treasury
Attn: Hank Paulson
1500 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, D.C. 20220

You should have your funds in a matter of...umm...days?

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 3:55 pm

smackaholic wrote:One other thing.

We dropped collision coverage last month.

You're fukking welcome, AIG.

You dropped collision coverage right at the point you were putting a teenager into their first car? Wow. You not very bright.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 6:08 pm

smackaholic wrote:Some fukker pushing a roll around through the pick and pull?

Awesome.

Those places are usually mudholes. Did he have mudder tires on the fukking thing?

Hey, this is a high class joint. That $2 cover charge is for a reason. Hard packed gravel all around.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 6:27 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:
smackaholic wrote:One other thing.

We dropped collision coverage last month.

You're fukking welcome, AIG.
You dropped collision coverage right at the point you were putting a teenager into their first car? Wow. You not very bright.

You priced collision insurance for a 17 year old lately goobs?

Insurance is gambling. No different than blackjack. I didn't wanna play high stakes.

If I had collision on an 11 year old 145K mile mini van, the payout would likely have been somewhere in the 2-3K range. Paying another 500 bucks or so every 6 months didn't make financial sense to me at the time. Today, it looks like it would have been a good idea. But, that's life.

Do you have any old beaters? If so, do you carry collision?

So, if and when she gets behind the wheel of something , it will be my old accord. And no, it won't have collision insurance either, because it still doesn't pay to carry it on old cars.

The brand new hyundai does have full coverage.

Goober McTuber · Post by **Goober McTuber** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 6:38 pm

smackaholic wrote:Insurance is gambling. No different than blackjack. I didn't wanna play high stakes.

Yet you did. And lost.

Still, you're little girl came out of it OK, and that's a plus. All the boys in the neighborhood are thankful that she didn't wind up with her jaws wired shut.

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 6:41 pm

Goober McTuber wrote:All the boys in the neighborhood are thankful that she didn't wind up with her jaws wired shut.

That's just wrong

But I laughed nonetheless.

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Wed Nov 19, 2008 9:57 pm

Evn I have to rack that one, you fukking corksoaker.

trev · Post by **trev** » Thu Nov 20, 2008 12:51 am

My son is getting his license in a couple months and I plan on having many long, painful lectures before he drives about distracted driving. No radio, no phone, no texting, no taking your eyes off the road, etc. etc. etc.

Shoalzie · Post by **Shoalzie** » Thu Nov 20, 2008 12:57 am

Goober McTuber wrote:
War Wagon wrote:My daughter rear ended some guy
Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree much?

Goober McTuber wrote:All the boys in the neighborhood are thankful that she didn't wind up with her jaws wired shut.

Goobs gets a double RACK...well done!

:bode:

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Thu Nov 20, 2008 1:34 pm

trev wrote:My son is getting his license in a couple months and I plan on having many long, painful lectures before he drives about distracted driving. No radio, no phone, no texting, no taking your eyes off the road, etc. etc. etc.

And i am certain he will listen to your every word, intensely.

Good luck and welcome to the club.

I recommend he drive something relatively big, slow and cheap.

Hopefully when he has his accident, everybody will walk away from it. The more I look back at what happened this week, the better I feel about it. I lost a nice, but reatively cheap rig. My daughter was taught something that non-stop nagging in stereo from her parents couldn't teach her.

Gotta go look at another villager a guy I work with has for sale today.

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 · Thu Nov 20, 2008 9:58 pm

smackaholic wrote:I recommend he drive something relatively big, slow and cheap.

You want him driving his momma... like all the other unemployed johns in town?

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Thu Nov 20, 2008 10:20 pm

smackaholic wrote:
Mikey wrote:...the OL got rear-ended by a pickup .....
full of messicans?

is that troll still around or was it over at ,net?

RUN, DOUCHEBAG! RUN!!!

smackaholic · Post by **smackaholic** » Thu Nov 20, 2008 11:40 pm

Do the crew and the truck full of messicans have a history?

I knew that it was some messicans that did douchey and his boys in the burgh last year, but, I wasn't aware it was those messicans.

Well, whoever it was, rack'em.

trev · Post by **trev** » Fri Nov 21, 2008 2:37 am

ucantdoitdoggieSTyle2 wrote:
smackaholic wrote:I recommend he drive something relatively big, slow and cheap.
You want him driving his momma... like all the other unemployed johns in town?

Come-ere. I wanna sit on your face. Very slowly.

Uncle Fester · Post by **Uncle Fester** » Fri Nov 21, 2008 2:52 am

So did your daughter at least pull out a gun and kill the guy?

War Wagon · Post by **War Wagon** » Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:06 am

trev wrote: Come-ere. I wanna sit on your face. Very slowly.

I think trev just threatened to suffocate some defenseless bro...

Run, ucant, Run!

PSUFAN · Post by **PSUFAN** » Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:22 am

Thinking about DB running makes me cackle.