Isn't fucking fitting that it comes down to Oregon and Washington.
I don't think I've felt this confident about a game since USC at Oregon in 2009, when Chip Kelly sent Pete Carroll looking for the eject button for college football. Yeah, we lost to them 2 months ago. On the road, by 3 points, on a missed last second FG, after missing conversions on three 4th downs in which we could have taken the points earlier in the game. I'm a homer through and through, but it didn't take green tinted glasses to see that the better team (TM) didn't necessarily win that game.
And that's why the Ducks are a 9.5 favorite, which in itself has to be some kind of record. I've never heard of an undefeated Power (4/5/whatever the fuck we are calling it now) team being a 2 score dog in a game like this before to a team with losses, let alone a team that they beat earlier in the year. I'm not quite as old as some of you geezers, but barring maybe some team some year with major injuries, I'm going to say this is pretty much a first.
The Huskies have been living on borrowed time for months. It's truly a miracle that they managed to get through without a loss, because they've been flirting with losses like they are Phoebe Cates in a John Hughes movie. Week after week, they've been Harvey Fucking Weinstein, sitting in his office, telling his assistant to send a loss up to his casting couch so they can get that nut, but week after week they've pulled it out at the last minute, so instead I'm the one with blue-balls here.
But hell, that's definitely for the best for the Ducks. That "perfect season" pressure is clearly getting to them and if they'd released that pressure with a loss a few weeks ago, we'd still be playing this game, but they might be loose coming into it as purely an underdog with nothing to lose. Somehow we find ourselves as the odds on favorite and still get to be the team with nothing to lose. It's a Christmas Miracle alright.
But Justin Timberlake isn't delivering Penix in a Box this year and this basketcase looks to be about one pick short of a complete mental breakdown.
Fucker is hiding on the sidelines, and being escorted off the field with a coat over his head like he's Michael Jackson.
Yeah, he's a picture of mental stability.
So, here we are Huskies. The end of an era. Our most hated rivals. #3 vs. #5. The biggest game in the rivalry's history. Probably the biggest game in the Pacific Conference history. It's THE GAME that the conference will be remembered by. You are undefeated. Win and you are in. All you got to do is not fuck it up. Good luck.
And for the rest of the end of the Pacific Conference...Well, I didn't ask for this and I didn't want it. I still don't like it. I spent over a decade with you all, shitting on the Big-10 the whole time. Never in my wildest nightmares did I imagine we could ever be a part of it.
Stanford: Fuck you for every time you ruined our season in both football and basketball. Fuck you for making me watch David Shaw's allergy to points. Fuck Chris Hernandez. And fuck you because my oldest daughter is a goddamned genius and might end up there soon making me take out loans to afford it. But I will miss you. Best of luck in the ACC, I guess.
Cal: The mid 2000's bridesmaid run you had was the pinnacle of your success in my lifetime. Which is pretty sad, but you gave this board quite the bitch in m2, which was fun. Every time we play it seems to be in a monsoon, so I won't miss never having to do that again. I don't even hate m2, so if you ever read this, good luck to Cal as well.
Arizona and ASU: These guys can fuck right off the Grand Canyon. I want nothing to do with the desert schools again. Just good enough to derail the season of whoever the snakebit Pac-10/12 champion is, and just bad enough to always embarrass the conference in Non-conference games. Have fun in your basketball conference and I will be glad to never think of you again.
Colorado and Utah: We barely knew thee. We barely care...buh-bye
OSU and WSU: I feel bad for Q West Coast Style and all my Coog fans out there. Truly I do. But I'd be lying if I said I don't find OSU's position to be a little funny and I know that Washington fan feels the same about WSU. Wow, the disrespect! Your in-state rivals ditch you and the world of college football relegates you to mid-major status in one fell swoop. And for it to end like this, which your rivals playing for all the marbles while you sit at home trying to keep players and recruits and failing to keep a coach. Oh man, if only there were a Beaver fan here to shit on.
It does look like the Civil War will go on, so it's not goodbye, but how long until the money and recruiting turns this "rivalry" into just another bodybag game?
USC: You started this whole thing. You tried to get away from us. You pulled the escape hatch and as soon as you got a life-raft you tried to seal the door behind you, pressuring the Big-10 NOT to take Oregon. But like Deniro in Cape Fear we are here, holding on underneath the car. We know you are afraid of west coast competition. You can't escape us.
UCLA: Keep Chip
That's it. Pour one out for the Conference of Champions. Lets win one last one. See ya on the other side.
I guess we play BIG TIME POWER FOOTBALL now that we are in the Big-10, so greetings to my new brothers and sisters. I'm not sure how to root for the Big-10, but I'm not complaining too much about we stand when 4 of the Top 6 ranked teams are (next year) Big-10 teams. But it's going to take some getting used to. First off, can we get a fucking real name for this conference? No, we can't be the Big-10 with 18 teams and B1G is a fucking stupid logo.
Ducks 42 Huskies 24
